Where I'm Safe
by Endless Catastrophe
Summary: Emma has been running all her life, the post-apocolyptic world being no exception. When she is taken in by a large group, she struggles to settle down and accept her newly found safe escape from the cruel world beyond the prison walls, while at the same time fighting the growing feelings towards their broken leader. Can Emma resist the urge to return to old habits in a new world?
1. Not Alone

This is my first attempt at a fanfic, so go easy on me. I was inspired after reading a few on this site. I have twenty chapters already planned out, but plan on doing more. This is going to start in between the events of season 3 and season 4. Bare with me, it's a slow start because I'm introducing an OC. Next chapter will have a few characters from the show. The next chapter is already finished. Make sure to review!

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><p>The sun came up slowly, illuminating pink and yellow hues across the tall golden field. I stood mesmerized, taking a break from the chaos beyond this field to take in this rare beauty. I feel a tugging at my hip and look back at the small girl who I'd only run into days before. I give her a soft smile when I notice her green eyes are wide and nervously searching the area.<p>

"We're okay Grace, just enjoy the moment," I sighed. The young teen only answered with a frustrated moan and lowered her hand from the hem of my shirt. I looked back at her now as the sun caught her features. She was too distracted by her thoughts to notice me staring, so I took the moment to actually look at my new companion. I had saved her just days ago from three biters. If it weren't for the one call for help she made, I would not have heard her. I found her quickly, frantically scrambling on top of a commercial garbage bin. Her long blonde hair was in a messy disarray as if she hadn't combed it for weeks. Her green eyes caught mine, and at first I could see her examining me from afar, unsure if I was just another biter coming to join for the meal. Her full lips finally parted from the tight line she had them in, and she called out for my help once more. I rushed over to her, readying the blade in my hand. I easily took down two of the biters with one quick stab in the skull, but as I was removing my weapon from the second ones eye socket, the third one reached for me from behind. I had to ditch my knife and find another weapon; I scanned the alleyway, not having a lot of options. The biter limped closer letting out a loud growl, knowing it had me, but suddenly it dropped. As it fell to the ground I saw my knife sticking out the back of its head, and the girl standing behind it breathing heavy. From then on she kind of stuck with me, not answering any of my questions about where she came from, and so I only replied to her vagueness with my own when she asked me anything. It was childish but I kept at it for my own entertainment. I hadn't expected to finally find someone in the zombie apocalypse only to feel just as alone as I had before.

I stared at Grace as we stood in the field, she finally gave up her name last night after I kept calling her kid, defending herself saying she was fourteen and that she didn't like being called that. It was then that I gave her my name, and she was quick to make fun of 'Emma' for being the most common name, even in a world as desolate as ours now was. I let her poke her fun; it was the first time we'd actually talked and held a conversation. She had asked how old I was and I had to think for a moment before I guessed 23. Not sure if my birthday had come yet, but knowing at least a year had gone by since my last. She still wore the white t-shirt and jean jacket that I found her in, despite the small bloodstains that stained them. She had agreed to trade her jeans in for some cleaner ones when we found a house the previous night with clothes her size, but insisted that her top and jacket were her favorite and she wasn't going to leave them behind. I managed to find some clothes as well, trading in my bloodstained clothes in for some clean jeans and a blue tank top and black leather jacket. We packed a few more just in case, and headed on our way as the sun was about to rise, we only made it halfway through the field when I had to stop and watch. For a moment I felt safe and allowed my olive skin to soak up as much warmth as it could. I glanced back at Grace, tucking my long dark brown hair behind my ear. She still scanned the edge of the field worriedly, but her shoulders weren't as stiff and her eyebrows weren't as perked up as they were a moment ago.

"See?" I laughed lightly holding my arms out dramatically, taking in the beautiful scene once more. Grace's dark green eyes snapped to meet my soft hazel ones and stared at me incredulously before turning her back to me. I rolled my eyes and reached down to adjust my black boots before turning back to her and giving a slight nod towards the woods. Grace, although relieved that we were moving again, nodded nervously, almost reassuring herself, before walking ahead and taking the lead. I followed behind closely and distractedly reached to touch my knife holstered at my side, and the gun at my other. It was fully loaded, as I had never used it. I was smart enough to find other ways of surviving an attack from a biter, and would do anything if it meant I could save bullets and noise from attracting more of them.

We walked for a few hours at a slow pace, stopping every so often to mark our way on our map to keep from going in circles, and keep from big towns where we would be overrun. We took a short break and found a spot by a stream to pick up some water and grab a bite to eat. I dropped a purifying tablet in each of our bottles and sat in silence watching it fizz. We had lucked out finding some survival gear in the cellar of the last house, including some decent backpacks, a knife for Grace and canned food.

"So what did you used to be before all this?" Grace asked nonchalantly from beside me. I pulled out a piece of fruit from the can and stuffed it into my mouth, prolonging the silence before I gulped it down and turned to answer. I couldn't help the smirk that came onto my lips as Grace gave me an annoyed expression, she quietly muttered "you're so gross," but I ignored the insult.

"I was a few things; a dance instructor, a bartender… oh and during the summer I would help out at my brothers 'survival camp', which was actually a lot of fun and…" my thoughts drifted off thinking about my older brother, but I quickly shook away the thought, not wanting to relive the pain of loss. I had grieved, and now I had to get over it.

"Cool," Grace smiled sarcastically, "so you never really had a career. Awesome."

I only answered her statement with a warning glare, but I couldn't hold it long against her smug look and fell into an awkward laugh, "yeah I guess I didn't, but it was a fun go, different things to keep me busy," I shrugged as I stuffed another piece of fruit into my mouth hungrily.

"I always wanted to be a cop," Grace sighed dreamily, I looked over to see her staring into the stream as though it reflected the future she once dreamed about, "My uncle was one, he looked after me a lot before my dad got out of jail. He was always so kind but he had this…bad side to him too, you know? It was like he was playing good cop/bad cop on and off the clock. But he was good at it, he was like the dad I wished I had."

I watched as her face fell, and glanced around cautiously before scooting closer to her, dropping my voice so it sounded more soothing, "Were you with your parents when this all went down?" I asked.

"Yeah, watched them get chewed up too just a few weeks ago. Was no different goin' at this without them than when I was with them. I always felt like I was being dragged along, like they couldn't wait for me to be gone and out of their hair," she continued staring off with a sad expression. I couldn't help wondering if she noticed we were having a conversation at all, knowing her to be more distant and introverted.

"Did they die back in that town?" I asked referring to the small town I had found her in. She shook her head, and looked up at me with tears in her eyes.

"They, uh, they died closer to Atlantic City. I came back here to try and find my uncle…" she sniffed, "but he, uh, he didn't…"

"Did you see him?" I asked, and when she nodded slowly, averting her eyes, I felt my heart sink. She seemed indifferent to loosing her parents, but seeing her uncle as one of those things…

"He was the one that went after you, the one I stabbed," Grace choked back a few tears and before I could reach for her, she stood up, wiping her hands along the sides of her pants, "we should go, find another house and set up for the night," she suggested, already packing up her things and wiping the tears from her face. As we left the stream I noticed her eyes were dry and no remnant of the conversation we had just minutes ago showed on her face. I took a deep breath, taking in step behind her, smiling slightly at the trust she was slowly placing in me, and it finally hit me that I suddenly didn't feel so alone.

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><p>Thanks for reading, make sure to review, next chapter is finished, and has a few favorite characters in it. I'll be sure to update soon!<p> 


	2. New Faces

I already had this chapter done by the time I uploaded the first, so I thought I'd post it because it actually has some of the original characters in it, and hopefully it's not as slow as the last chapter as it has a lot more going on. Again read and review and I'll get started on the next one asap.

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><p>I awoke to the sound of glass breaking, a lot of it. I sat up quickly glancing over at Grace who slept through the noise with a soft snore. I debated waking her up, but when I heard the sound of voices; I immediately rolled over and shook her awake. She awoke groggily, waving me away. As the voices grew louder, her ears perked up and she looked to me for help. I ushered her underneath the bed in a hurried whisper. I reached for my gun as I cornered myself out of the room slowly when I was able to determine they were still downstairs. I slowly lowered myself down the steps, hearing the clattering coming from the kitchen off to my left. I stood against the wall as I reached the last step, willing myself to take a quick look around the corner. There were two of them hunched over looking through all the lower cabinets; I was about to announce myself, when I heard a familiar click right behind my ear.<p>

"Drop the gun, and I might let you live," came the gruff voice holding the gun to the back my head. The tip of the barrel pressed threateningly into my skull, and in reply I slowly raised one hand, as I bent to drop the gun with the other. There was no use in arguing when I was so obviously outnumbered. The two in the kitchen turned to face me, obviously surprised by my appearance. One of them had dark skin, and her oval face was accented with her long dark dreadlocks, the smile vanished from her face when her wide brown eyes met mine, and she reached behind her reflexively towards a large sword, the name of it escaped my tongue. The man beside her was Asian, and had a goofy demeanor about him; by the look of him I guessed he was friendlier than the woman who stood next to him. He slicked his black hair back as I knelt down. Another two faces came into view as I was told to turn around, one was a larger dark toned man with a beanie on his head, his eyes were also wide as they took me in, but his rifle was lowered, and he looked to the other man standing across from me, waiting for his command. It was him who I found myself looking at now, his blue eyes wandered, looking over me before snapping up and meeting my own. His hair was dark, and waved away from his face accenting his straight nose and harsh eyes; his beard was thick and spotted with gray. As I took in his appearance, his jeans, cowboy boots and button down blue shirt, his eyes lowered to meet mine as my eyes hovered over the top of his shirt. I hadn't realized I was absently gazing at his exposed chest but I quickly snapped out of it when his cold blue eyes bore into mine.

"I said, are you alone?" he asked with a growl, the southern drawl behind his voice only made it sound more menacing.

"Yes," I quickly replied, but my eyes gave me away when they snapped up the stairs when I was reminded of Grace.

"Go check," he ordered the people around him without looking away. As the larger man slowly made his way of the stairs with his rifle aimed and ready, the leader spoke again, "you wanna try that again, this is the last time I'll ask nice: _are you alone_?"

Before I could answer a loud scream came from upstairs as Grace ran away from the man, down the stairs and wrapped her arms around my waist.

"Get away from me!" She snapped before turning her head to see the other two behind us. My hand came down reassuringly on her head in comfort and I saw the leaders eyes soften slightly.

"It's just me and her," I finally said flinching slightly as the sound of stomping upstairs continued as the man searched every closet and cupboard.

"What are your names?" He asked softer, putting his gun down and nodding at the others behind us. I heard them whisper as they continued to scavenge the cupboards, something Grace and I hadn't done yet.

"My name is Emma, and this is Grace," I gestured at Grace, who still clung to my waist. I saw her glare as she carefully examined each person in the room. Finally a few seconds later the man with the rifle stomped down the stairs giving a nod to the leader.

"My name's Rick, this here is Tyreese," he slapped the man coming down the stairs on the shoulder, and then gestured behind us as we turned to be introduced, "this is Michonne, and this here is Glenn. We haven't come to hurt anyone, just gather up supplies and leave."

He stood between the two, again giving them a pat as he said their names. Michonne continued to glare at me, but dismissed herself saying she was going to check the rest of the house. Tyreese left with her so it was just Grace and I alone with Glenn and Rick.

"So…you two sisters or something?" Glenn asked nervously, obviously trying to ease the tension.

I shook my head, but as I did I thought I should have lied to save from a longer story, but the thought left as quickly as it had come and I continued with the truth.

"I ran into Grace a few days ago, I was going at it alone ever since this thing started, she had been with her parents before they were caught a few weeks ago. She saved my life," I admitted glancing down with a small smile as Grace loosened her grip and met looked at Rick with an uncertain look in her eyes.

Rick and Glenn listened intently before Rick lowered himself to meet Grace's gaze.

"How are you?" he asked kindly, he had a fatherly aspect about him that I instantly admired. However Grace, as I expected, was a bit more difficult.

"I was fine until you guys broke in here and, _Tyreese_ is it?" She asked sarcastically, not giving him a chance to answer. Rick only looked up at me shocked by her tone, "Right, well until Tyreese put his hands all over me."

I looked at Rick apologetically as I gave Grace a warning squeeze on her shoulder. She shrugged me off with a huff before turning and running upstairs. I looked back over at Rick and Glenn who watched me carefully.

"Sorry she's, uh, she's going through all that hormonal teenage stuff," I said with an awkward chuckle. Rick only grinned and looked back at Glenn who was still clearly shocked by Grace. I admit she didn't look the type to be so sassy, in fact just the opposite, but as soon as she opened her mouth it kind of just fit and became the normal for her.

"Clearly," Glenn muttered before turning to me with a small smile and left the room to continue scavenging.

"We didn't get to search the house yet, so I'm not sure what you'll find," I glanced over to Rick who only nodded.

"You can pick up your gun, I trust you won't try anything," He said after a pause.

"I wouldn't waste the bullets," I admitted as I picked it up slowly, holstering it all while watching him watch my movements cautiously.

"I just have a few more questions for you," he nodded his head over to the small table in the kitchen. I sat down folding my arms, not sure what to expect.

"How many walkers have you killed?" at first his question caught me off guard, and I sat in silence for a moment as I thought about his question. I ignored his intense stare as I thought, and finally I lifted my eyes to meet his.

"As many as I needed to, I didn't kill biters…I mean walkers, if it meant I'd waste ammo or put myself in danger," I answered honestly. I never kept count, but I knew I had worked up a large number. Rick nodded to himself as he thought over the answer, accepting it.

"How many people have you killed?" again I wasn't expecting the question, but I answered much quicker.

"One," I answered sadly. This time I couldn't meet his gaze.

"Why?" he asked, a bit more urgently now.

"Because he…" I started, feeling my eyes begin to burn as the tears welled up, "because he…"

"Was he bitten?" Rick asked his tone soft and understanding, and I looked up to see his eyes were too. I nodded, allowing one tear to fall before shaking the rest away and clearing my voice.

"My brother, he was so optimistic, and so prepared. I never expected to see him go down, but he did," My fingers found a lose piece of wood along the side of the table and I picked at it idly as I explained, "he didn't even give himself time to react to the bite, he just wrapped my hands around my knife and told me to do it."

I wiped my eyes and looked up at Rick who stared off behind me as he listened to my words, letting them sink in. Eventually his blue eyes found mine and all I could see was pity.

"You and Grace are welcome to join our group," he said finally, I looked at him confused, not sure what to say, but he continued, "We just recently added a large number of survivors from another group, you won't be the only new ones to arrive," he offered quietly.

"You would let us come with you?" I asked surprised. My mind still was wrapping around the fact that there were three others wandering the house, and now to hear there are more of them, survivors. I had gone countless months thinking I was alone, thinking I was all that was left. Finding Grace didn't exactly ignite any hope in finding others, but now I was sitting across from one. He gave me a polite smile and nodded.

Grace appeared at my side with both our backpacks, and I could tell she didn't expect us to go with them. She thought they were here to scavenge and be gone, but when I told her that Rick had invited us to join his group, she looked over at him surprised. She didn't say anything but the way she gripped my hand as we all walked out the front door told me she wasn't going anywhere without me. I smiled down at her as we loaded up our belongings into their cars, and saw the hope light up in her eyes as she watched the four strangers working around her. I noticed she didn't look at them with the same hatred, as before, and instead watched them with curiosity.

The ride back to their group was silent. Rick, Grace and I went into a light green Hyundai, while the other three went into a large silver truck. I couldn't help the occasional glances I threw back at Grace as she sat in the back by herself, but each time I looked at her I was only met by an annoyed glare. Eventually I relaxed and looked over at Rick who caught me staring and only gave me an awkward smile before turning his attention back to the road.

"So what did you do before all this went down?" he asked curiously, glancing over.

"I was a dance instructor, and a bartender," I started, saying it to Grace was easier, I didn't care what she thought, but somehow saying it to Rick made me feel like my life before was insignificant, "During the summer I helped out my brother with a summer camp he had started. It was survivor stuff, living outdoors, tracking and catching your own meals. I did it for fun, I loved being outside, but I guess it came in more handy than I ever could have imagined."

"That does sound fun," Rick said with a light chuckle, "I remember being boy scouts, I didn't last long though. I was too impatient I suppose."

"What did you do?" I looked over catching his gaze, "before all this happened?"

"I was a cop, sheriff deputy actually," he admitted.

"You were?" before I could reply, Grace was leaning forward obviously interested and asked him as soon as the words left his lips.

"Yeah…" he looked back surprised and let out a low chuckle, "why you like cops?"

"You could say that," she started, "did you kill a lot of bad guys? Were you like a good cop, did you ever interrogate anyone by like chopping off their fingers?" she wiggled her own dramatically for affect, "Was there a dirty cop in your department? My uncle found one and locked him up, got an award and everything."

"Well I'm afraid my experience wasn't quite as exciting," he laughed, "I did the everyday police thing, patrol through the town and caught the occasional criminal. Up until I got shot twice and ended up in a coma, my line of work was pretty average."

"You got shot?" Grace leaned closer, but I shot her a look and she leaned back in her seat with a smug look, "that's awesome."

"Yeah, not the first thought that comes to mind when I look back at it. I woke up in the middle of all this, stumbled out of the hospital seeing dead bodies and walkers everywhere. You could say I was in denial for the first bit," he recalled distractedly. His eyes looked past the road as he remembered waking up alone and in the middle of an apocalypse.

"But you survived, and found others?" I asked, knowing the answer, but curious about his story and eager to hear more.

"It's a long story, but yes," he shook the images flashing across his memory away and smiled at Grace and I. His knuckles turned white as he gripped the steering wheel and I could tell he didn't want to get into it further, already sensing that his survival story was more dark and upsetting than he let on. The rest of the car ride was silent, but soon the trees began to fade and a large grey building came into view. It didn't take long for me to realize it was a prison, and as I searched for something to say, Grace beat me to it again.

"You have got to be kidding me."

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><p>Hope you guys liked it, don't forget to review!<p>

Review reply (Guest): thanks, I hope I do the characters justice! That's always the tricky part.


	3. Home

I'm so excited to have gotten my first few followers and reviews, motivated me to write four more chapters (yeah I got a little excited). I'm super impatient and it's taking a lot for me to not just post them all. Anyway continue to review and I'll post more throughout the next few weeks. Thanks again for the support guys!

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><p>We pulled up next to a few other cars and I watched as they shut the gate behind us. In the distance I could see the walkers pressing up against the fence as a few strangers took them down on the other side with sticks and poles. All in all it seemed like a secure place, and I felt myself relax. As we climbed out of the car, I could see Grace inching towards me as she took in the new faces that suddenly made their way over, surrounding us.<p>

"A welcoming party?" Grace muttered. I only reached for her hand and gave a gentle reassuring squeeze. Rick rounded the car and introduced us to the others. I gave a small smile and waved awkwardly as he spoke my name. Grace didn't offer anything, and instead watched each face carefully, seeing how they watched us, taking us in. I felt awkward standing still, and so instructed Grace to help unload our stuff. The crowd of people didn't seem interested anymore and began to disperse. Only a few stayed behind to introduce themselves. The first one to approach Grace and I was a taller woman, around my age with short brown hair. She had a friendly smile planted on her face, but I could see her measuring us with her eyes.

"Hey, I'm Maggie," she gestured at herself with an awkward chuckle, "where'd Rick find you lot?"

I looked down at Grace, but she only looked at the ground playing with the buttons on her jacket.

"I'm Emma, and this is Grace. They found us in a house they were searching. Found more than they were bargaining for I suppose," I shrugged. She replied with a light laugh, taking a glance back at the prison behind her.

"Well we could always use more hands in securing the place," she smiled, "anyway I thought I would introduce myself, and let you know you can come to me for anything you need help with."

Glenn appeared behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist, nuzzling himself in the crook of her neck.

"Excuse us," she laughed, sending an apologetic look our way before running off with Glenn in tow.

"I don't think we need to be worried about these people, Grace," I pulled my hand away as I kneeled down beside her, not noticing the two others walking up to meet us. Grace looked up at them before climbing back into the car and slamming the door behind her. I looked over to the strangers standing there, expecting the surprised looks from Grace's tantrum they now had.

"Sorry, she isn't a fan of strangers," I apologized for her as I took in the two new people who stood in front of me. One was a woman with short grey hair, despite having a fragile look to her she had a confident hold to her that I admired right away.

"That's fine, I find in this world it is always smarter to not trust others so easily," she spoke lightly, but I wondered if there was a threat hidden in her tone, she met my gaze with the same smile and continued, "I'm Carol."

"Emma," I reached across with my hand extended cautiously, but she giggled at the gesture and pulled me in for a hug. I didn't have time to respond to it before she pulled away, holding onto my shoulders gently before letting go completely and gesturing to the man standing beside her.

"This is Hershel," He smiled immediately as I turned to look at him, though it was hard to tell by his long white beard. His light green eyes extended the smile, and I felt myself return it with a genuine one of my own. Without thinking about it I reached for a hug, wrapping my arms around him. I felt his chest rumble as he laughed, before I pulled away quickly, embarrassed.

"No need to feel ashamed by a hug, we're all friendly here," he assured me. I only nodded in response, unsure what to say as my eyes found his crutches and saw how one of his legs cut off around the knee. At first I couldn't bring myself to look back up at the two of them, knowing they caught me gawking. Again he chuckled, and I couldn't help looking up at the two of them, "A war wound, one I wear with pride knowing I wouldn't still be standing here without it, more or less."

"How did it…?" I couldn't bring myself to finish the question, knowing the answer.

"Got bit, Rick was quick in cutting it off, took a bit of recovery time, but I was back on my feet in no time. I admit I was just happy to see my girls again," he answered nonchalantly, as if he told the story many times. His eyes wandered off to the side, and I wondered if his 'girls' were still around.

"Hershel," Rick's voice appeared suddenly as he hurried to join the three of us, he gave a quick nod to Carol and I before turning to Hershel, "One of the new kids got a bad cut, they need you inside to do some stitches, Beth's helping out until you get over there."

"Alright then," Hershel gave me a warm smile before turning and making his way towards the door Rick had come out of. Carol followed him, waving goodbye as she walked away. Grace climbed out of the car just then, hugging her backpack to her body as she watched the two of them walking away and forgetting Rick was behind me.

"I thought they'd never leave," she muttered, ignoring me as I knelt down beside her once again.

"Grace, you gotta help me out here. These people are being kind by taking us in and giving us a place to stay, show a little appreciation," I told her sternly. Her eyes snapped down and glared at me, she was about to open her mouth to argue when Rick interrupted. I saw her flinch at the sound of his voice as she looked over at him startled.

"It's no trouble, I'm sure she'll come around," he smiled down at her. I stood up looking at him apologetically, again feeling like I should do something to make up for Grace's attitude.

"Thanks," it was all I could manage under his intense gaze.

"Let me show you around, at least show you to your bunk anyway," he smiled nodding towards the prison. He turned and starting walking up to the building, Grace and I scrambled to get our things and catch up with him, he didn't seem to notice our heavy breathing or Grace's comment on him leaving without us as we approached.

"Am I right to get we sleep in the cells?" I asked nervously as we made our way up the steps and into the dark hallway.

"You'll get used to it," I couldn't see his face, but could hear the smile in his voice. There was only a moment of darkness and then we were suddenly walking through a large barred door into an open area. As expected it was cemented, and the only color that stood out was the plain gray of the walls, ceilings and floors. Grace and I only had a fraction of a second to react to the simplicity of the room before we suddenly found ourselves staring wide eyed at the large amount of people that filled it. They either sat at the few round tables eating or playing cards on the floor. A few kids ran past us to go outside, a scolding father followed, warning them to be careful. A few faces turned to look at Grace and I curiously, and I found myself zipping up my jacket when I caught a few of them looking too closely. Rick didn't bother stopping to introduce us, and I figured most of them had already heard of our arrival. We made our way past what I could only call the "lounge-like area", and past through another barred door frame into the cellblock. Rick stopped us near the entry way, and began listing off the few cells that were vacant.

"We've got two in this one, and further that way, is the new one we cleared, it has more available if you'd like to go look there," He suggested.

"I don't think we'll find anything different, this cell will do," I pointed at the one on the main floor he had said was available, and he answered with a nod and walked over to it as we followed.

"You can put your stuff anywhere you want in here, just remember to respectful of the people around you when it comes to noise and such. The toilets don't work, so don't use 'em, but other than that if you have any questions just ask anyone," he looked around as a few people passed by him, giving him a respectful nod or a wave. He faced us before finishing with a mocking grin, "we don't bite."

"Ha ha," Grace said sarcastically as she hoisted her stuff to the top bunk. I shot her a look before turning back to Rick, about to thank him, and only finding an empty space where he stood only seconds before. I frowned to myself as I made my way to my bunk laying down on the stiff mattress. Grace had already fallen asleep but I couldn't get comfortable. I gave up on trying to sleep, deciding it was still too bright outside to sleep anyway, and left my cell to explore the rest of the prison for myself. I caught sight of Rick in the common area, hovering over a table and laughing with a few people, one who I recognized as Michonne. I walked past them, not feeling welcome to their conversation as I made my way outside. The cool air tickled my skin as I made my way towards the fence, keeping an eye on the walkers in the distance. I didn't realize anyone had followed me until they spoke.

"Whatcha lookin' at?" The voice asked, causing me to jump back in surprise. The girl grabbed my arm as I fell back, quickly shouting apologies as I waited for my heart to slow down. Another person had come up, curious at what had me at loss for words.

"What'd ya do to her?" a gruff voice asked. I looked over at the two of them, not recognizing the girl who scared me or the man who just showed up.

"Nothin' I just scared her by accident," the girl said with annoyance as she spoke to the man. Her long blonde hair was done up in a ponytail and she wore a dirty yellow shirt and ripped jeans. She looked young, at least younger than me. Her voice was soft, angelic almost as she spoke, even when she spoke to the man beside her. He rolled his eyes at her, but looked over at me curiously. His shaggy brown hair covered his eyes, but I could still see his icy blue stare. He wore a dark long sleeved button up underneath a leather vest. His jeans were also ripped, but the look suited him. He licked his lips, narrowing his eyes at me when he noticed me looking over him.

"I just didn't hear you coming," I finally said, "I'm not used to being around people, the only time something comes at me from behind it's usually one of them."

I pointed my thumb behind me towards the walkers, and I could see it clicking in the girls mind as she looked away embarrassed.

"Usually I'm more careful about that, sorry," she apologized.

"It's fine, I'm just gunna have to get used to it," I smiled at her reassuringly, I held out my hand, "I'm Emma."

"Beth," she smiled back, reaching for my hand and shaking it gently.

I looked over at the man, extending my hand to him as well, but he just scoffed at it and left. He muttered something under his breath, but I only caught 'pussy' before he got too far away for me to hear. When he turned around my eyes immediately went to the crossbow strapped across his back.

"Don't mind Daryl, he can be a grump sometimes," Beth sighed staring after him. I looked over at her and found her smiling the same wide genuine smile. I wasn't sure how to react to her sudden kindness, it seemed almost effortless for her, and instead turned my focus back to look beyond the fence, towards the walkers. Seeing them standing out there pushing against the fence was like a snap back to reality, I felt the stress and tension re entered my body causing me to stiffen. Suddenly I didn't feel so safe, and I realized then that in this world, no matter how many fences stood between those walkers and me, I would never be or feel safe again.

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><p>Don't forget to leave a review, every bit helps me get this story going!<p> 


	4. Him

I couldn't help myself after reading such lovely reviews. Hope you enjoy this chapter, I did!

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><p>Beth and Carol announced dinner a few hours later, and at first I wasn't going to go; I was planning on spending the rest of the night in my cell while Grace continued snoring above me. My plan quickly fell apart when Rick showed up. He entered the cell apprenhensively, unsure if he was welcome. I nodded when I saw him standing in the entrance, pointing up at Grace holding a finger to my lips. He took a step back and gestured for me to come with him. I took a deep breath wondering if I should shake my head and tell him to go without me, but the thought didn't last long when a voice in my head reminded me that he had brought us here and we were in his debt. I lifted myself slowly, walking over to him and then in step with him as we made our way out of the cellblock.<p>

"How are ya holdin' up so far?" he asked as we filled our plates, glancing around at the laughter and voices that filled the room.

"Alright, I've met a few people, everyone seems nice," I smiled over at him. I was about to walk over to an empty table but he caught my arm.

"I thought we'd go outside, get some fresh air," he suggested, already tugging my arm, leading us outside. The sun was beginning to set, the final rays of light barely making it through the trees all the way to the prison. He pushed the gate leading into the field aside, not bothering to close it as we made our way through. He found a nice enough spot on a small hill and sat down. I was a bit hesitant at first, unsure what to expect.

"Daryl caught a deer, so it's a bit of a feast tonight," Rick said filling up his mouth with the contents of his plate, "I'll warn ya now to not get too used to it."

"I'm used to living on less," I admitted, finding a spot to sit just below him on a flatter surface.

"So you really were on your own for all this time?" he finally asked as he gulped down half his plate.

"Give or take a few days," I replied, referring to my run in with Grace. Rick nodded to himself, pulling out his water bottle from beside him and offering me a sip. I shook my head at first but he tempted me again with a grin when he caught me licking my lips. I quickly took a sip and handed it back, before turning to my own plate with a frown.

"You not hungry?" he asked when he caught me picking at my food.

"No I am, it's just…" I laughed at myself, shaking my head at my own stupidity, "I was a vegetarian before all this, and when the world went to crap, I thought I'd never have to worry about eating meat again."

Rick watched me carefully as I pulled the meat a part, picking up a bit and sniffing it before reluctantly stuffing it in my mouth.

"So how is it?" he asked with a grin.

"It's good," I admitted with a moan, hearing him chuckle at me, "I guess you can't afford to be picky anymore. But it's delicious."

I emphasized my point by taking a bigger mouthful, letting out another moan. Again he laughed and I smiled up at him.

"You didn't have to eat it, but you would have been missing out," Rick chuckled softly.

"It's for the better, trust me," I laughed taking another bite.

"I'm glad to hear it," he grinned as he placed his plate on the grass beside him, rubbing his hands together distractedly.

"So can I ask?" I finally said after some silence. He looked down at me curiously, and I was suddenly wishing I hadn't said anything.

"Ask what?" he mumbled leaning forward.

"About how you found this group, how it all started," I watched as his expression changed, his eyes hardened but I had already seen the sadness that flashed across them as I finished my question. I knew I had overstepped some boundaries, and so quickly found myself backtracking, "you don't have to tell me if you don't want to…I can see it hurts you just from me mentioning it."

Ricks gaze lifted to meet mine and he relaxed as I dismissed the question.

"I'm sorry, it's just…" he started, his voice shaking, "I start thinking about my wife, and the others we lost, and suddenly it's a much darker story."

"You don't have to apologize, I shouldn't pry. It's just hard to find anything to talk about," I laughed trying to lighten the mood. Rick didn't laugh this time, but instead forced a smile as his mind wandered.

"Hey…" I shifted closer to him, resting my hand on his arm reassuringly, "I know you don't know me as well as everyone else, but I'm here if you ever want to talk."

Rick smiled still lost in thought, so I continued.

"I used to be a bartender, as you know, and part of that job is listening to people talk about their lives and their dreams and all their problems," I chuckled as I recalled the stories I'd heard from drunken strangers each night, "I'd offer my advice time to time, but I knew they wouldn't remember come morning. I'd like to say it was good advice though."

Rick chuckled and I looked over to see the light back in his eyes.

"Oh I'm sure it was," he said jokingly with a laugh.

"Hey!" I slapped his arm playfully, and he laughed harder, "I'll have you know I made some great tips handing out all that expert advice."

"I never said you didn't," He laughed again, holding his hands up defensively. I watched him carefully as he chuckled once more, running his hands back through his hair. He had a handsome face, and it wasn't until his eyes met mine that I realized I'd been staring too long. I looked away with an awkward laugh, but the image of his intense stare stayed in my head and had my stomach doing flips.

"We should probably head back," He finally said, I only nodded, not wanting to meet his gaze, "I hope I didn't take you away from anything important, I just thought it would be nice to get to know you better."

"Yeah, it was nice, thanks," I looked up at him then, and instantly was lost in his blue eyes. I felt myself shift closer to him, but before I could move any closer or say another word, another voice ripped through the air, snapping me out of my daze.

"Dad!" a young boy wearing a large brown cowboy hat made his way to Rick and I, "wasn't sure where you'd gone."

The boy looked me up and down curiously. As he noticed the small space between Rick and I his curious gaze vanished and instead he glared at me as though I'd taken something that wasn't mine.

"Carl, this is Emma, we was just talkin', getting to know each other," Rick shifted uncomfortably between us.

"Hey," I smiled at the boy, but his glare didn't falter.

"They need you inside," Carl said, not taking his eyes off me.

"Okay, you comin'?" Rick looked back at me as he asked, unaware of his son stiffly shaking his head towards me. I looked over at Rick, unsure how to answer.

"Can she even talk?" Carl snapped. Rick shot a look to Carl, causing the boy to look away muttering something under his breath.

"Emma, you alright?" Rick glanced back at me with a worried look.

"Yeah," I laughed lightly, looking away from Carl, "yeah, sorry I, uh, I think the deer didn't hit me right. I'll just stay out here in case I get sick."

"Do you need anything?" Rick asked glancing at Carl, who stood impatiently waiting for his father.

"No I'll be fine, I'll just get some more fresh air before heading to bed," I waved my hand dismissively. Rick reached for his water bottle from where he left it on the ground, handing it to me.

"Just in case," he smiled softly. I didn't bother arguing, and took the water bottle. Playing with the lid until Rick and Carl finally said their goodbyes and made their way back to the prison. Rick turned to look back at me as he shut the fence, and for a moment it was like it was just the two of us again sitting and laughing. The butterflies came back and had my stomach doing flips. I looked away quickly, ashamed of myself for what I was feeling. In the distance I heard Rick reprimanding Carl for something he had said followed by the clanging of metal doors as they walked up the stairs, heading inside. I looked up again slowly, watching longingly as they retreated into the prison. A cough came from my right, and I looked over in surprise as Carol stood there, one eyebrow perked and giving me a knowing grin.

_Shit._

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><p>As you can tell my updates have been a little sporadic, so make sure to follow so you get notified when I do. PM me if you have any ideas for the story, since its taking place just before season 4 there's a bit of leeway with the story. Don't forget to review, and again thanks for the support.


	5. Her

I stared at the bunk above me, thoughts drifting around my head. I had been awake for a while, but couldn't find the motivation to leave my bed. Grace moved around above me, reminding me that I wasn't alone as I lay there. My mind drifted yet again as I thought about the night before. Mostly I replayed my confrontation with Carol, who only said that she'd given some food to Grace before coming to look for me because Grace was worried. She didn't comment on Rick, and I was thankful for that, I wasn't even sure what I would have said. As I thought his name, chills went down my arms. They were good chills, but they still scared me. I didn't notice Grace lowering herself from the top bunk and slowly walking towards me as I let his image settle in my mind.

"Hey…Emma!" she whispered, shaking me gently. I looked up at her, offering a weak smile, "you hungry?"

"I guess, why?" I started sitting up; tugging my shirt down when I noticed my stomach was exposed. Grace reached for her own when I heard the loud growl come from inside her.

"I'm starving, I barely touched last nights dinner. Will you come with me?" She asked. I squinted my eyes up at her as my head rushed from moving so quickly. She was still apprehensive about the others, but she had asked nicely so I wasn't about to torture her by making her wait or saying no. I left my jacket on my bed, not noticing the cool air as we left our cell, leaving my arms bare. It was then I noticed just how dirty I was, and I reached up to pat down my tangled hair self-consciously. Grace caught me primping myself and rolled her eyes, a small smile creeping at the corners of her lips.

"You look fine," she nudged me. I laughed, embarrassed, and wrapped my arm around her shoulder as we entered the common room. There were only a few people wandering about, and I wondered if it was still too early to be awake. Grace didn't seem troubled by this and made her way to Carol, who was already preparing a dish for us as we approached.

"Morning," she smiled up at us, clearing some spots for us to sit next to her. Grace didn't hesitate, taking the oatmeal and sitting down quickly so she could scarf down her food.

"Good morning," I smiled back, unable to keep eye contact for long.

"Did you girls get some rest?" Carol asked, continuing to eat her own portion.

"Yeah," Grace said, her mouth full. I was surprised she was even able to get anything out as I noticed how puffed her cheeks were from practically inhaling spoonful's of food, "I don't remember the last time I had a good sleep."

Again her words were muffled, and she spat some out as she talked, but Carol didn't seem fazed by this and laughed softly.

"Now who's gross?" I teased Grace as she shoveled in another bite.

"That was different," she swallowed, "you had juice dripping down your chin and you were making loud slurping noises, moaning after every bite like you'd never eaten before."

"I was enjoying my meal," I laughed as I defended myself, forgetting that Carol was a part of our conversation. I reached over flicking a piece of oatmeal off Grace's cheek.

"Are you not hungry?" Carol asked when we'd finished giggling. I looked down at my bowl, noticing that I had yet to take a bite.

"No I am," I said lifting my spoon, "I guess I'm still waking up."

We continued our meal with a casual conversation. Carol would ask a question and Grace would answer for me. I didn't try to interrupt; I was too in awe of Grace as she finally opened up to Carol. She was vague with her answers at first, not offering up much, but Carol kept asking questions, undeterred by Grace's shortness.

"Was it just you and your parents the whole time?" Carol finally asked. I saw Grace stiffen from the corner of my eyes. She had finished her bowl easily, and was now spooning her way eagerly through mine when I offered it up. I didn't expect her to answer, knowing she usually closed up at any mention of her parents.

"Yeah, we ran into a few others but they were too stubborn to join up with 'em. Didn't trust no one," she finally answered. I watched her carefully as she answered, Carol reached over placing her hand on Grace's in comfort. I watched as Grace gave her a sheepish smile and pulled away slowly, "I didn't want to trust no one after they got taken, and I would probably still be alone out there if I hadn't been saved by Emma."

She looked over at me with a look I hadn't ever seen her use before. Was it respect? Or tenderness? I couldn't tell, but it filled me with warmth as I leaned in to give her a tight hug, pulling away after feeling her shift uncomfortably. Carol spoke up again as I pulled away from Grace.

"I thought I heard it the other way around? Didn't you save Emma?" Carol asked. I looked up at her, seeing her curious gaze, knowing she was eager to learn our story. I didn't get the feeling she was trying to pry, but was simply looking for a way to get to know us. I glanced down at Grace, who had already filled her mouth with the remains of my bowl.

"We saved each other, in more ways than one," I gave Grace a smile, but she only watched me with the same curiosity as Carol, both waiting for me to explain. Before I could begin stumbling over my words, the door leading outside opened and we all turned our attention to watch Carl, Rick and Tyreese walk inside. Rick and Tyreese whispered to each other, continuing the conversation they had outside. Carl looked over at our table as he scanned the room tiredly. As his eyes found mine his gaze quickly shifted into a scowl. Before I could do anything, Grace started coughing, getting both of our attentions. Carol rubbed Grace's back as she struggled to swallow her food. I was about to scold her for eating so quickly but stopped when I noticed the red flush in her cheeks as she glanced back in the direction of Carl and Rick. I looked over too, and watched as Carl's eyes softened as he looked at Grace. He shifted, looking down and then up again this time with a shy smile. I watched as they gazed at one another before Rick stepped between them, pulling Carl further in the cellblock. I rubbed my legs as I looked away from Grace, trying to pretend I hadn't seen the interaction between her and Carl only seconds ago. My ears perked up as a loud cry echoed throughout the common area. I looked over to it's origin, watching the cell blocks entrance curiously as I heard the cries quickly stop and then turn into cooing and pitched giggles. Grace and I looked at each other, disbelief in her eyes. I knew that we were right; that what I had guessed to make those noises was real. Carol interrupted our wordless conversation.

"Have you met Judith?" she asked, standing up with a grin. Just then Rick walked back into the common room with Carl shadowing him. At first my eyes didn't believe it, but as Rick turned my eyes widened as I came face to face with the little human he held to his chest. At first I smiled at her, as I had always had a soft spot for children, and she smiled in return, though I wasn't sure if she could even see me. But then my mind starting putting the pieces to this, Rick had a son and now a daughter, as I glanced around at the people joining us I found myself wondering which one was their mother…which one Rick belonged to.

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><p>"She died a while back, giving birth to Judith," Carol finally said as I pushed my arms forward to thrust a crowbar through the fence, taking down a walker.<p>

"Who?" I asked, looking over to Carol as she pulled back her knife from a corpse. I watched as it fell, letting out a final growl as it sank to the ground only to be replaced by two more. Maggie walked up to my left joining in as we tried to take down a few more, attempting to relieve some the tension on the fence.

"Lori?" She piped in, looking at Carol curiously. She looked between the two of us, obviously wondering why the topic had some up.

"Yeah," Carol looked over at Maggie, then at me, trying to figure out how to continue. Maggie ducked her head, and for a second I thought I saw her eyes widen as she figured it out. I only responded by taking another stab at walker, his face sagged on one side, almost as if it had been mauled at by an animal. I got a whiff of his foul smell as I drew in closer. I was familiar with the smell of death, but it was never one that I would get used to. He fell easily enough, and I quickly retracted the crowbar only to stab another one again.

"I was there when it happened," Maggie finally said. I tore back the bar roughly, looking over at her with raged breaths, "it happened so quickly, she was losing so much blood, handed me the knife and told me what to do, not caring if the baby's life took her own."

My heart swelled hearing this, being reminded of my brother, mentally feeling the knife in my hand as he told me to kill him. As I looked over at Maggie, despite her focus on taking down walkers, I could see the pain on her face as she remembered losing her friend.

"Rick wasn't the same after her death, he kind of…" Carol trailed off, and as I glanced at both of them I could tell it was a sour topic.

"Lost his mind," Maggie finished with a huff.

"He's stepped up though, I mean," Carol took down two more walkers before turning to us, "he snapped back, he came through for Judith and for Carl. He may have his moments, but he's getting better…for them."

Maggie only nodded in agreement, taking down the last two walkers on our perimeter. Not feeling comfortable with the present conversation, I came up with an excuse to leave and waved goodbye. I glanced back and found them watching me, talking to each other. I couldn't help but notice them sharing the same grin, as if they knew something I didn't. I turned and walked back into the prison, mentally casting aside the image of Rick and the way he made feel.

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><p>Thanks again for all the support, make sure to followfavourite and review!


	6. Outside

Finally decided I made you guys wait long enough for this chapter, it's a slow build but leads into a more intense chapter coming next. Enjoy!

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><p>A few days had passed but nothing much had come of them. I had done my part for the group, going on shift when asked and doing my tasks as instructed. I often found myself wandering back to my cell, keeping to myself. I knew it was my own fault I felt so isolated, but from being on my own for so long to suddenly being faced with a large group of people had me feeling overwhelmed. Grace wandered into the cell just then, a smile beaming across her face. Her smug look faltered when she caught sight of me sitting in the corner hugging my knees to my chest.<p>

"What are you doing?" she asked, raising a brow.

"I don't know, just thinking I guess," I mumbled, not sure how to answer the question when I didn't even know why I was doing what I was doing. I rolled my eyes at myself as Grace stepped closer.

"You doing okay, Em?" she sat down next to me, resting her hand on top of mine.

"I don't know," I answered again, "I guess I'm just feeling…down."

"Well cheer up!" she nearly shouted, lifting herself off the ground, "you need something to do?"

I looked up as she stood with her hands resting on her hips, looking around our room until her eyes settled on something. She looked back down at me, a smirk playfully tugging on her lips.

"Here," she reached and picked up something off our table, and when I saw what was in her hands I wasn't sure what I expected her to say, "take this back to Rick, ask him if he needs your help with anything and get your sorry ass out of this cell. It's depressing as hell in here."

I didn't reprimand her for her language, but instead reached for the water bottle as she handed it to me. I tossed it from one hand to another before finally standing up and moussing her hair, much to her dismay.

"Hey! Knock it off!" She shouted, quickly hurrying to the mirror and fixing the minimal damage I had caused.

"See you later munchkin," I laughed, on my way out I paused, looking back as she patted down the golden waves in her hair, "Grace? Thanks for getting my sorry ass out of this depressing cell."

She rolled her eyes, and continued primping her appearance as I left. I past a few cells before glancing into the one I knew Rick kept for himself. I frowned when I saw it was empty, and continued through cellblock, eventually entering the common area. Rick stood in the corner talking to Daryl as they hovered over a map, pointing at different locations and listing off the supplies they needed. I approached slowly, and watched as their heads lifted when I stopped in front of them.

"Hey, I thought I'd finally give this back," I handed Rick the water bottle, trying my hardest to ignore the chill that went throughout my body as his fingers brushed over mine.

"Thanks," he smiled as he reached for it, "How you holding up? I haven't seen you around much."

"Still trying to find my place here," I smiled back with a slight not, looking over at Daryl who surprisingly offered a amall encouraging smile.

"You'll get the hang of it," he said hoarsely. I smiled in return to Daryl, not expecting him to acknowledge me. Then again I suppose around Rick he'd play nice.

"Anything I can help with?" Rick offered, closing the map and handing it off to Daryl.

"Actually I came here to ask _you_ that, are you going on a supply run? Maybe I could help?" I offered eagerly, but the way they glanced at each other gave me my answer before Rick spoke.

"We got all the hands we need, maybe I can get Carol to find a job for you there's always…" I quickly cut him off, feeling the frustration building up inside me.

"Please Rick, I'm a good shot, and being here is making me feel claustrophobic. Let me prove myself out there," I insisted. I stared into his eyes, watching as he carefully calculated my words. Again he looked over at Daryl who gave a stiff nod before walking off behind me.

"Alright…" he looked down with a smile, crossing his arms over his chest before his eyes met mine again, "I'll let you go, but I don't want you to push yourself, don't put yourself in an unsafe situation. If you put yourself at risk, you put everyone else at the same risk. In and out, okay?"

"Thank you," I nodded in agreement. He studied me carefully, still trying to convince himself he made the right choice.

"We leave in ten," was all he said as he walked out the doors, announcing it loud enough that the others in the room looked up and nodded as he passed by. I watched as Glenn and Maggie stood up from their table and left to get ready. I followed them into the cellblock, making my way to my own cell, not expecting to find Grace with company.

Carl looked up at me startled as I walked in. I stopped as soon as I saw him, and looked to Grace who sat on my bed across from him. She gave me a stern look, one that told me I wasn't welcome. I reached for my jacket on the foot of my bed, and went over to the table Carl sat in front of and picked up my gun and knife before holstering them. I took a second looking down at the floor before I lifted my gaze and shot Grace a hard glare. She sank back in my bed, not expecting my reaction.

"We'll talk when I get back," was all I said before I spun out of the room and left to join the others outside. At first I wasn't sure why seeing Grace with Carl upset me, but I eventually concluded that I was still annoyed by the way he looked at me, like I was here because he _let_ me be here, and that he was in charge. I shook away the thought, laughing at myself for getting worked up about an adolescent boy.

"Ready to head out?" Rick called out at the small group that formed around the two vehicles. Everyone nodded, and I looked over to meet his gaze. He stood silently, waiting for my answer, and I nodded quickly as I felt everyone's eyes on me. I ducked into the nearest truck as it was getting packed up, it wasn't as nice as the newer one that Grace and I saw when we were picked up by Ricks group. I sat in the passenger seat, hearing the driver side open and close, but I was too distracted by my own thoughts to look over and see who I was with. My door opened, and I just about fell onto the pavement if Daryl hadn't caught my arm and pushed me back into the cab.

"Scoot over would ya?" he waited while I slid into the middle seat, and I apologized to the person in the driver seat as I buckled my seat belt.

"No problem," Rick chuckled. I froze as I felt his breath tickle my neck as he laughed. I looked up wide eyed, not expecting to see him sitting there inches from my face, assuming he would drive the other car as he had before. Daryl shimmied in next to me, pressing me uncomfortably close to Rick. Neither seemed to have any problem, and I just about glared at Daryl when I saw him stretch out his legs, making room to put his crossbow on the floor of the truck. He reached out the window slamming his hand on the top.

"Let's head out!" He yelled. Rick started the truck as I squished myself inward, afraid to touch either person sitting next to me. Needless to say, it was the worst car ride of my life.

The ride was full of jokes and comments about the people back at the prison, Rick and Daryl shouted over the roar of the engine, often reaching to look past me to look at the other. When I realized I didn't have enough background to join in on the conversation, I tuned them out; instead focusing on the scenery. I watched as the trees would fade, exposing a field, and was reminded of a few days ago when Grace and I had stood in in a similar one, completely unaware of Rick and his group only a few miles away. I felt a gentle hand on my knee, and looked over at Rick who chuckled as I jumped in my seat from the contact.

"Was just checking to see you were still with us, you're so quiet," He smiled bringing his finger to his smooth over his lips as he stared out the windshield.

"Sorry," I smiled looking down at my fingers as they played with the zipper on my jacket, a usual thing that happened when I was nervous, "got lost in my thoughts again."

"What d'ya think about?" Daryl asked, I looked over at him, but he was looking out the window. I knew he only asked to get me talking, and in a way I was thankful for that.

"Life, before this. And life before I ran into your group," I admitted staring ahead.

"Rick said you was working at a summer camp, survival shit and whatnot?" Daryl asked curiously.

"Now I did not word it like that," Rick interjected with a soft laugh.

"Yeah I did," I smiled, "My brother ran the camp, he was into all that kind of stuff, convinced himself that it would come in handy one day."

"Guess it did," Daryl mumbled.

"He never got the chance," I said softly, knowing I had shifted into an uncomfortable I tried to move on to something else, "He taught me a few things that came in handy, I'm a shitty tracker but I know the basics. I'm good with a knife, it was one of my favorite weapons, but I did learn to use others. A crossbow for instance, I probably still have a decent shot with that."

"You'll have to show me sometime," Rick smiled, "Daryl, maybe you could teach her a few things about tracking and hunting. You wouldn't have to start from scratch."

"Yeah," he grunted, "but you ain't gettin' your hands on this bad boy."

He nudged his crossbow with his foot defensively and Rick and I laughed.

"He's very predatory over it," Rick chuckled leaning into me as he spoke. My breath caught as his skin rubbed against mine, but I shifted out of his touch quickly before I could make a bigger fool of myself. I looked over at Daryl and sure enough he saw what happened. Rick was still oblivious, humming along to a song that had somehow wandered into his thoughts. Daryl only gave me a look, before looking away with a smirk. I threw my head back; this was going to be harder than I thought.

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><p>As the truck pulled to a stop along the curb of a small cul-de-sac our laughter died down and we shifted the present conversation aside, immediately focusing on the current task ahead.<p>

"Daryl, make your way around the first one, break in through the back as Glenn brings in the front, Maggie and Tyreese will do the second, Karen and Carol the next. Emma and I will check the one a little further out, remember to keep the noise to a minimum. The guns are only a last resort," Rick explained the plan as we all huddled around him, looking over at the house we were tasked with as he called our names. I looked over at the house Rick had me targeting with him, and my heart sank when all I saw was a dirt driveway with a small brown house further back. Something didn't feel right about it, but I shoved the feeling aside, dismissing it as me simply being out of practice. As Rick and I walked over to the house, he gave me careful instructions as we neared the old brown rancher.

"Emma?" I looked over at him, not realizing I had completely stopped walking until I saw him a few feet ahead looking back at me worriedly, "are you okay?"

"Yeah," I nodded, hurrying to catch up to him, "Yeah, I'm just reminding myself how this goes, how to do this again."

"You sure you're up for it? Remember what I said…" He looked between us and the house, unsure if was I was ready to handle the task at hand.

"I can do this Rick," I said weakly, but quickly went to recover myself with a cough and straightened myself up as I met his gaze, speaking again but this time more confidently, "I can do this."

He watched me for a long minute, searching for any sign of doubt or uncertainty. I didn't look away from his stare, ignoring the way his blue eyes made my heart flutter as they gazed into mine.

"Okay," he finally sighed, knowing we didn't gave the time to stand around. I knew I would have a harder time convincing him to let me come on runs if I didn't prove myself in the next fifteen minutes. I watched him quickly run around the house, and knew that was my cue to start my way in through the front. I brought out my ka-bar as I opened the door slowly. A walker quickly charged at me from the other side and I didn't hesitate as my knife quickly sunk into its skull. I watched with satisfaction as it fell when I retracted the blade. I took a few seconds to look at the young woman who laid at my feet as I shut the door behind me. She didn't look like she was any older than I was, but the rotting flesh, swollen eyes and blackened teeth made it hard to tell. I stepped over her quickly, knowing I had little time left to do what needed to be done. The entry way as a long horizontal hallway and I made the decision to go the left towards what looked like the living room. The place was relatively clean, no cushion out of order or discarded items on the floor. I walked past the couches and moved quickly to the sliding glass door searching for any signs of Rick. I saw the door was slightly ajar and when I went to open it a movement in the distance caught my eye and had me frozen in place. The backyard was relatively small, only a small section of grass beyond the patio before suddenly merging with the vast forest behind the home. It was from those trees that I saw them approach one by one. They dragged their feet along the ground as they made their way around the small house, oblivious to my presence behind the grungy glass door. I stood there for what felt like hours as time seemed to slow down, watching as the small herd continued on their trek for food. I was too stunned to notice a few of them had broken from the group and were now limping in my direction when they noticed me. My eyes snapped to watch the few that were now nearing the patio, eyes hungrily watching me as they quickened their pace.

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><p>Thanks again for all the support and make sure to keep those reviews coming! They inspire me to write more, and I have so many plans for this story and hope you guys are liking the direction it's going so far. I'm in the middle of Chapter 7 as I hate cliffhangers and don't want to leave this hanging for too long. So follow, fav and review! Cheers.<p> 


	7. A Close Call

Thanks for the love guys! Here's Chapter 7, enjoy!

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><p>I gasped in horror as a hand reached from behind me and clamped down on my mouth. Rick pulled me into him as we shuffled away from the door, retreating further into the house as he whispered calmly into my ear.<p>

"I found a closet, we'll hide until it's safe," he instructed. I watched as he opened the small linen closet, pulling me into the tight space. I didn't try to shy away from him, instead wrapping my arms around him and ducking my head into his chest as we listened closely for any threat. Our ragged breathing filled the silence before the sliding glass door slowly opened followed by the sound of guttural hisses. I squeezed my eyes shut, imagining myself to be anywhere else than in the situation I was. I mentally kicked myself, knowing I was at fault for the two or three walkers making their way into the house. If I hadn't stood there like an idiot, Rick and I might have survived as the herd made their way through our location. The sound of heavy footsteps faded away as they wandered towards the living room. I knew it was only a matter of time before they wandered to our side of the house and sniffed us out. Rick seemed to think the same thing as he pulled away from me, releasing his protective hold around me as he reached to open the door. I didn't make any noise, but gave him a questioning look as he turned to me, slowly closing the door behind him motioning for me to stay quiet. As the door shut and left me in the dark, panic surged through me. This wasn't the first time I had been in a situation similar to this one, but rather than going out and facing my fears, I was allowing Rick to treat me as the weakling he thought I was. I hated feeling like I was the inconvenience and decided then that I wouldn't wait for him to come back for me when it was safe, instead opening the door slowly and went out to help defend us against the current threat. Rick had disappeared, quickly going off to eliminate the few walkers that had made their way inside. I walked carefully past the kitchen back into the now empty living room, swiftly shutting the sliding door and locking it shut. The backyard was now empty as the herd had continued on, unaware of the few missing walkers that had seen me. I turned around, blade ready when I heard the quick shuffling approach me. I smiled as I took down the walker with an easy stroke and walked away, not bothering to linger and examine the body as I did before. I had to find Rick, and I had to help him. I came across two more walkers in the entryway, taking them out with a little more difficulty as I struggled to regain my weapon from the skull of the first one in time to stab the next one as it reached for my arm with a loud snarl. I let out a heavy breath as I looked down at the two walkers I killed, along with the third I took down when I first arrived. My frown deepened when I noticed another one laying dead further down the hall in the direction of the closet. I stepped over him, and saw the closet door ripped open, guessing Rick had returned and found it empty. My eyes search around the area, trying to determine where he had gone when I heard a loud yell come from beyond the closet. I ran towards the main bedroom, stopping cold when I saw the two walkers clawing at the bathroom door. I could hear Rick grunting loudly as he attempted to press himself against the door to keep them from coming in. Not wasting a second, I brought my knife up again, expertly taking the two walkers down in a few swift movements. I knocked on the door softly, Rick opened it quickly from his sitting position behind. I was about to say something when he called out loudly in warning.

"Watch out!" He shouted. I spun around, but dropped my knife before I could use it. I raised my arms bracing myself against the oncoming corpse, stepping against the walker as it struggled to take me down. I shied away from a few lunging movements it made with its head, trying to bite my flesh. Its strength was more than I expected, and I fell backwards onto the bed, my arms struggled to keep it away as I adjusted to the quick movement. I felt its breath when it got close, only a few inches from my throat as it gave out one last snarl before a gunshot filled the room and the rotted creature collapsed on top of me. His weight was quickly removed as Rick pried him off me and lifted me back onto my feet, not saying anything as he felt and looked over my skin. I knew I hadn't been bitten, but didn't argue as he turned me around a few times to check.

"You alright?" he finally asked when I turned back to face him. I answered his question by wrapping my arms around him, breathing in his musky scent as I leaned in for support. Exhaustion quickly replaced the adrenaline, and he wrapped an arm around my shoulder before bringing me down to sit beside him on the bed.

"I'm fine, just out of practice," I shrugged after a few seconds of silence, "are you okay?"

I reached up, allowing my fingers to softly trace his jaw and neck, smiling weakly at my attempt at a much less thorough check for bite marks or scratches. He watched me silently as I looked over him slowly, and when I brought my eyes back up to meet his I felt my cheeks grow red. I removed my hand quickly, feeling the tingling sensation on the tips from his beard.

"I'm fine," he said softly, "thank you for saving me back there."

I looked up at him, surprised by what he had said. I shook my head, not accepting his gratitude.

"You saved my life Rick, if you hadn't…" I looked down at the walker who just a moment ago was inches away from making me his meal, "you risked a lot by firing that gun."

"If I hadn't, you'd be dead," Rick pulled my chin up so I was meeting his soft gaze again, "it was well worth the risk, besides the herd was far enough away that they wouldn't have heard it."

"You couldn't have known that," I started seeing the uncertainty in his eyes as he made that statement, but gave up when I saw him look away. He wasn't interested in the argument I was making, and so I dropped it for the time being, instead offering a quite "thanks."

He looked back over with a soft smile, offering a nod before taking his hand away.

"I'm just glad you're okay," Rick whispered, his gentle eyes pulling me in like a magnet as i felt myself subconsciously lean in.

"I'm just glad that _you're _okay," I whispered softly, one of my hands resting on his leg as we started closing the space between us. I quickly pulled away at the sound of an uncomfortable cough coming from the entrance to the bedroom.

"Sorry to break this up," Daryl said gruffly, causing us both to jump and look over and seeing him leaning against the doorway with a cocky grin, and i asked myself just how long the hunter had been standing there,"thought you two slow pokes could use some help."

"Did you see the herd?" Rick asked, quickly standing up without meeting my eyes and made his way over to his friend and clapping him on the shoulder as they walked towards the kitchen. I faintly heard their conversation as I struggled to keep up.

"Yeah," Daryl nodded, glancing back at me quickly, "saw them make their way from this place and down the street. A few of us hid behind the cars or in the houses, no one got hurt."

I watched as he nudged the dead walker in the kitchen before beginning his search through the cupboards.

"Took down a lot of walkers in here," he stated, looking over to Rick.

"Nah, I only got one before hiding in the bathroom," Rick sighed, motioning in my direction before continuing, "Emma got the rest before taking down another two going after me."

"Well well," Daryl looked over at me impressed, "looks like we recruited quite the lil' ass kicker, hey?"

"Yeah," Rick chuckled, still avoiding my gaze.

"Guess we need a few more fighters on the front lines," Daryl nodded before turning his attention to the pantry.

"Jackpot," I heard him mutter as he began stuffing his near full backpack full of cans and jars. Rick barely looked my way as he instructed me to go try the bathroom and bedrooms for anything else we needed. Making my way back in the direction we came, I was able to scavenge some medicine and supplies as well as a few things I thought might be used to decorate mine and Grace's cell. I rejoined Daryl and Rick who were patiently waiting in the living room for me to return, not feeling comfortable in splitting up now that we had seen a herd come through.

As we packed up the cars I had pulled Carol aside and asked if she might switch vehicles with me. When she gave me a knowing look, ready to agree, Daryl shouted my name and snapped us both into focus.

"Emma, git your scrawny ass into the truck girl," he hollered, chuckling along with the others as I jogged to his side, looking back in time to see Carol's apologetic smile. Daryl announced to the others it was time to go as I slid into my seat next to Rick. I didn't dare look at him, but felt his eyes on my as I buckled up my seatbelt and stared ahead, ready to go. The truck came to life with a loud roar, and I watched as the houses faded behind us, leaving the moment between Rick and I in that small bedroom in the rearview mirror.

The rest of the drive flew by in silence; Daryl offering a few words here and there but Rick only offered vague answers and Daryl soon got the hint. I helped unload the truck once we pulled up to the prison, bringing my personal loot back to my cell and throwing it on my bed before leaving the cellblock. Having been beyond the prison walls earlier that day, returning to my cell had me feeling claustrophobic and I hurriedly made my escape back outside and breathed in the fresh air. I walked through the field, making my way to an unoccupied guard tower and climbed my way to the top. I found a nice spot in the sun as a sunk into my spot along the edge, resting my head on my arms resting on the bar in front of me. Feeling like I was being watched, I looked down towards him as he stood off to the far right corner of the open yard. Rick looked up at me curiously and I wondered if he was thinking about those few minutes alone we shared earlier just as I was as I gazed down at him. I watched a small smile spread on his lips, and I knew right then that he had been. I looked away as I felt my cheeks get warm, laying on my back but still letting my legs dangle over the edge as I hid from his view. I didn't think he knew the effect he had on me, but that Rick Grimes was going to be the death of me, I was sure.

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><p>I'm so excited for the next few chapters, and wanted to get this one posted now because it's setting up the mood for the next few to come. I'm trying to let Emma show off her personality a little more, and trying to get her relationship with Rick developing at a good and realistic pace. Let me know who you guys want to see more of, what you like and don't like, I'm all for constructive criticism, anything to keep this story going. Thanks again for the support, don't forget to followfav and review! Cheers!


	8. The Hunt

Posting this and next chapter hopefully in the same day, hope you enjoy!

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><p>I didn't think I would be ready to face another walker again for at least a few weeks, but now here I was, three days after the incident with Rick and I was standing inches from a large mass of walkers who had accumulated over night and now pressed themselves against the fence again. It became habit; I eventually didn't even have to think about it as the movements became rhythmic for me. Reach back, push forward, pull away; reach back, push forward, pull away. I watched with a smirk as they dropped one by one. Though I stayed at the fence longer than most, I didn't stay very long. Eventually the smell of decay and rotting flesh became too much and I would feel nauseous from the repetitive movements and smell combined. I hadn't gotten sick before, but today the exhaustion was beginning to catch up to me and I stumbled over beside an over turned car and thrown up the meal had eaten that morning. I wiped my mouth sloppily, trying to ignore the burning in my throat and bitter taste in my mouth. I looked up, quickly glancing around me to make sure no one had seen what had happened. I felt the sickness creep up inside me again when my eyes locked on Rick as he stood off at the entrance to the field, looking directly at me with a worried expression. I ducked my head, moving behind the vehicle as I cursed myself for getting sick. Rick had barely glanced my way and hardly spoken to me since we arrived back at the prison from the run. I thought it was because he was disappointed and didn't want me going on any more runs, and didn't want to break it to me. But yesterday Daryl had approached me and asked if we could talk. I followed, expecting to hear it from Ricks confidante that I would be assigned to another job where I could be useful. One could imagine my surprise when he invited me to go hunting with him the next day with Rick and Carl, and asking if I'd be interested in making another run with the group the following week. I eagerly agreed, not surprised when the hunter nodded uncomfortably and quickly stalked away, knowing he wasn't one for making small talk.<p>

"Emma," I snapped out of my daydream, looking up and being immediately blinded by the sun as Rick stood above me. I didn't have to wait for my eyes to focus to know he was concerned, I could hear it already in his voice, "are you alright?"

I shivered slightly as he touched my arm in attempt to comfort me. With a slight nod I stood up and smiled sheepishly at him.

"Sorry you had to see that, the smell of them was starting to get to me," I nodded towards the walkers, happy to see I had made a dent in the hoard that had been there earlier.

"That doesn't matter, I just want to make sure _you're _okay, that you're still up for our plans this morning?" Rick asked softly, his southern drawl causing butterflies to flutter inside me.

"Of course!" I smiled brightly, momentarily forgetting he had just seen me vomit.

"Good," he nodded looking down, "I've been looking forward to it, Carl too. He doesn't get the chance to get out much."

I tried not to frown at the mention of Ricks son, instead keeping the small smile plastered on my face as I confirmed the time we were leaving and walking past Rick hurriedly as I tried to contain my excitement for the day ahead.

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><p>"Can I come?" Grace whined from her bed. She had been moping around all day when I had finally gotten around to finding a suitable enough punishment for having Carl in our cell earlier without my permission. Granted I may have over reacted, but seeing them look up in surprise and embarrassment when I had walked in on them, I knew I was interrupting something intimate. Being around Grace had had maternal instincts develop in me towards her. I found myself constantly worried with her whereabouts, unsure if she was safe or needed me with her. Grace noticed my change in attitude towards her, and while acting annoyed I could tell she didn't mind. If anything I sensed that she liked the way my concern for her grew, and noticed that she had begun to trust me more than she had ever before. My punishment for the visits with Carl, however, was one I knew she hated me for. Carol had been kind enough to agree to my favor, easily creating a list of chores for Grace to do while I was doing my own work for the group, and watching over her carefully when I couldn't. As much as I knew Grace loved having a bit more motherly attention around her, I also knew she despised being babied.<p>

"I don't know Grace," I said with a frown as I checked my gun for bullets before holstering it to my side.

"Please! Come on, I should know all this stuff in case we get separated or if something bad happens and I'm left on my own again…" she continued to list off every possible thing that could go wrong that could leave her alone and needing the necessary skills to survive. I rolled my eyes, knowing this argument was only going to go her way.

"If you ask Rick, and he says it's okay, then okay," I finally gave in, cutting her off in the middle of one wild scenario involving a post apocalyptic Rambo, refusing to give her aid because she couldn't fire a gun. Mind you this was after The Terminator would leave her behind, claiming "he won't be back" because she didn't know how to defend herself. Man this girl had a wild imagination. She hurried off with a squeal and a stream of 'thank you's' followed behind her as she ran off to find Rick. I hoped he would be stricter, insisting that we didn't need a big group going out to do a few simple tracking routines. I should have known better, Grace had gotten increasingly better at finding ways to make her wants and ideas appear to be your own. I had found ways to block it out, but as I saw her skipping happily back to our room only a few minutes later, I knew Rick hadn't been as successful. I eyed her suspiciously as she hummed happily, pulling her hair into a low ponytail and prepared to join us for the hunt.

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><p>I didn't bother changing out of my black yoga pants and white tank top before leaving, only removing my running shoes and replacing them with my comfier mid knee black combat boots. I debated on putting on my leather jacket, noticing the air had begun to cool as we drifted into winter, but quickly decided against it when I remembered the hot Georgia sun blaring down on me earlier that morning. Grace dressed comfortably too, wearing jeans, running shoes and a grey pullover. I raised my eyebrow when I watched her walk past me, swearing I saw the kid wearing make-up. I tucked the conversation away for later as we made our way outside, joining up with Daryl, Rick and Carl who stood hovered over another map of the surrounding area. They looked up from the tailgate of the truck they had propped to support the map so everyone could see it, Carl smiling at Grace and Rick smiling at the both of us. Daryl just offered a stiff nod before turning his and Rick's attention back to the map. I nudged Grace teasingly when I caught her batting her eyelashes at Carl as we came to a stop beside them, reminding her that while she would get to hang out with him I would be with her the whole time.<p>

"We're just about ready, thinking of taking the cars out a ways where its clear, learn a few things and see if we can find dinner," Rick glanced up as I stood next to him, looking over the map as he pointed out the spot we were headed. I nodded with a soft smile, trying to hide my excitement and play it cool. I knew if I seemed too eager that it would just make Daryl nervous about letting me come. Glancing down at the map a second time, I frowned seeing how far out we would be, suddenly not sure I was ready to go back out there, never mind have to worry about Grace on top of that. Rick seemed to sense this as Daryl packed up the map and called Carl and Grace into the cab of the truck. Rick and I climbed into the back and sat against the back of the cab as Daryl started the truck. I couldn't help feeling giddy as we drove off, feeling my hair fly around me in wisps. I was reminded of the long summers before walkers and the fight for survival, when my brother and I would be allowed to sit in the back as our dad drove us to the hardware store. I smiled as our soft giggles of excitement echoed around my mind. Without even thinking about what I was doing, I stretched out my hands to the side feeling the familiar pressure pushing against my hand as we sped down the empty road. I glanced over at Rick, expecting to see him watching me curiously, but quickly retracted my arm to wipe away the tear that I had noticed sliding down his cheek. He looked up surprised, snapping out of whatever dark thought had put him in such sad state. I looked away when his eyes locked on mine, and for a moment my hand stayed resting on his cheek as the wind ripped around us. I tore my gaze away, feeling embarrassed that I had once again touched him without permission and began to pull away. His hand caught mine, and I looked over breathlessly as he interlocked our fingers wordlessly. When I looked back up at him he was looking the other way, but I could still see the soft smile playing along the corner of his lips, another tear slid down his cheek as he rested his head on the back window of the cab. He quickly caught it with a sniff and closed his eyes. I looked away then too, glancing over to my left and watched as the trees flew past, feeling my heart thud quickly in my chest as the warmth of his hand intertwined with mine crept its way up my body and heated my cheeks. I only wished the truck never stopped, that we could sit there in quiet agreement of the feelings for one another that had grown out of our control.

As we came to a stop mine and Ricks hands pulled away from each other almost automatically. I watched as he jumped over the side, looking back and holding his hand out as we waited to help me down. Casting a glance over at Grace, I gave a slight shake of my head as I carefully jumped off the side, catching myself in an awkward stumble as I heard the chuckles around me at my graceless dismount. I looked over at Daryl and Carl, surprised to see the playful light in their eyes matching the rare smile either of them ever showed; especially towards me. Daryl announced the game plan, leading us into the trees next to the truck. Glancing once again at Daryl, watching his eyes light up as we entered the wooded area, I was reminded of my brother. As we walked further into the trees, I felt a calm come over me as we entered an environment familiar to me, and as I looked over at the usual stone faced hunter and saw the small smile creep up on his lips, I was further reminded of the potential I had to build relationships with all of these people. I just had to try harder.

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><p>Hope you enjoyed, next chapter will be up shortly, just making the final touches! Thanks again for your kind words of support, favfollow and review! Cheers.


	9. Touch

Enjoy!

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><p>We all listened carefully, watching closely as Daryl crouched down and began explaining the different things to look out for. He started off with the more obvious things that often went unnoticed: broken branches, disturbed pathways and footprints. My gaze wandered over to Grace and Carl as they listened, both of them watching so carefully I couldn't help but grin. I looked up at Rick who was also watching his son with his arms crossed, the look in his eyes not showing anything other than pride. Rick lifted his gaze and met mine when he felt me staring, smiling slightly before we both turned to look back down at the teenagers. As Daryl started getting into the more tricky stuff I crouched down to get a better view. As I did, the other three rose suddenly and followed Daryl as he caught sight of some hoof prints and began tracking a deer. He made sure to ask for their help every now and again to make sure they were paying attention, nodding impressed when they both answered correctly each time. As Rick and I followed, I started becoming more and more aware of his fingers graze my arm each time we took a step forward. At first I brushed it off, thinking it was just because we were standing so close and trying to keep up, but I soon caught on to the way his fingers would gently stroke me each time, creating little patterns as he did. I was lost in thought; too distracted by the way his touch affected me to notice the others had stopped. Carl shot out a loud yell of protest as I walked into him; I attempted to recover by backtracking, but veered off to the side and tripped over a large root. I knew I was already making a fool of myself and didn't bother reaching out to the branches or trees beside me knowing it would only make me look even more helpless. I fell on my ass with a loud groan and before I could try to lift myself up, strong rough hands clasped around my arm and yanked me onto my feet.<p>

"Dang woman, you always this clumsy?" Daryl growled as he brought me to my feet.

"Unfortunately it just comes naturally to me," I mumbled, wiping the dirt off my backside as Grace, Rick and Daryl laughed.

"Yeah well you should watch where you're going, maybe try paying attention for once," Carl spat.

"Carl," Rick warned suddenly. I had only been with the group close to two weeks, but in that time I had never seen Rick stand up to his son or call him out for his constant rebellious behavior. Carl stiffened at the tone of his fathers' voice, and I watched as he looked over to meet Ricks glare with one of his own. A moment passed before Carl finally gave up, mumbling a sorry in my direction before turning around and continuing on the trail by himself, not bothering to wait for the rest of us. Grace quickly followed, not able to meet my eyes as she hurried to join Carl. I noticed they were falling off the trail, and looked over at the two men beside me. Rick nodded to Daryl, who then turned and followed the kids as Rick and I stood in silence watching after them.

"I'm sorry about Carl, he's just going through some things," Rick mumbled as he watched his son with worried eyes.

"It's fine, Rick. I should have been watching where I was going," I said with a huff, looking away from Grace as she said something to Carl, making him laugh loudly.

"It's not fine…that boy…he…" Rick looked back to me as he stumbled over his words, obviously irritated with his son's actions.

"Forget about it, Rick," I forced a smile as I turned to face him, "like you said, Carl's going through some stuff."

"You wanna head back to the truck?" Rick finally suggested once their figures disappeared behind a few thick bushes. I shook my head, turning around and walking back the way we came. As I followed our trail back to where we had started, I kept my eyes on the ground, attempting to calm my anger from Carl's outburst. It was more frustration then anything, not understanding why the kid had it out for me when I did nothing wrong; at least not on purpose. I stopped walking when my eyes caught sight of the small tracks I'd noticed before, but quickly dismissed when Daryl spotted the deer ones. Rick didn't question me as we went off in another direction, eyes searching the ground to try and see what I was seeing. My pace quickened when I noticed the tracks were getting fresher, and to my great delight, I saw more than one rabbit just a few feet ahead of us as we crouched down. Rick chuckled softly when his eyes caught sight of them.

"I guess now all we need is Daryl's crossbow," he muttered. Without saying anything, I reached back to him, trying to be as quiet as possible when I pulled out his knife. I heard his breath hitch when I lifted his shirt to expose the sheath but was too focused on my current task to take any notice. I turned back around, pulling my own blade ready in my hand along with Ricks'. I knew it would be no problem nailing one of them; it had just been a while since I had tried to do a repetitive hit with a blade. It didn't help that Ricks knife and my own were dissimilar, but I took a deep breath, closing my eyes and focusing on calming my thoughts. I think that was the first time I could actually ignore the fact that Rick near me as I felt Rick's breath tickle the back of my neck. Without warning, my hand shot up and snapped forward, slinging one blade through the air. I wasted no time clasping the other one between my fingers and in that very same second, snapping it forward to follow swiftly after the other. It was no deer, but I was so proud to see both blades hit their two targets. The other two that had been in the open area in front of us had now darted away to safety. I rose quickly, hurrying to pulled my blade from one of the rabbits and ran a little further past it to sink the blade into the skull of an oncoming walker I had noticed. Rick quickly followed, checking to make sure we were safe before we retrieved our game.

"Good shot," Rick chuckled, his tone matching the surprise on his face as he lifted the larger one, taking his blade from its side and putting the knife back in its sheath on his waistband.

"I told you," looking up at him with a smile. Rick and I stood there again gazing at one another longingly. In that moment I felt like I understood the void that was always constant between Rick and I. At first I had thought it was him not ready to admit the feelings blooming between us. But now it started to click and I understood. I knew for him it wasn't just a void, but a person: his wife. I could see it in his eyes, when he looked at me he saw her next to me, reminding him of his guilt for her death and the way I could see he felt for me. It was then that I understood why he couldn't look at me when he held my hand, he had wanted to touch me but couldn't. Not when he felt like those haunting eyes were there, judging him. Rick was lost, stuck in a place where he didn't know how to move on from her, and I knew he couldn't do it alone. It was a lot to realize in that short moment, but as I looked into his eyes I knew I was right. I took slow and calculating steps towards him, eyeing him cautiously like he would run from me any second. He held my gaze, breath shaking as I reached for his hand and brought it to my lips. I held it there, tasting the salt from the sweat on his knuckles before dropping it carefully. My hand hung onto his a moment longer before I pulled away looking away as I tried to hide the small smile tugging at the corners of my mouth.

"We should head back to the truck," I whispered softly, not waiting for him to say anything as I once again followed our path back to where we had started, and eventually back to the truck. Rick didn't say anything, and I didn't expect him to. Hell I had already begun readying myself to go the next few weeks without so much as nod or glance in my direction.

"Hell I was just about to go lookin' for you two," Daryl called from the truck. He had finished wrapping the dirty blue tarp around the large body of the deer they had caught. His eyebrows shot up in surprise when he saw the two rabbits we carried.

"She tracked them on her own, took 'em down with our knives," Rick answered Daryl's unspoken question.

"Well damn girl, if I'd known you was that good I'd had put you through the advanced course," Daryl joked, reaching for rabbits and folding them in with the deer.

"Just happy to contribute," I shrugged, pulling myself back into the back of the truck, stepping over the large body wrapped in blue. I was surprised to see Rick climb in the back with me, half expecting him to trade seats with one of the others. He settled into the same spot as before, looking out towards his side as the truck roared to life and pulled back onto the road. I didn't push him to talk to me, I even held onto the side for dear life as Daryl made a rough turn that would have otherwise had me falling right into Rick. I didn't pay any mind to it, instead watching sadly as we left our spot, already missing the comfort and calm I had forgotten the forest had to offer.

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><p>The ride back was silent, but I found peace in it. I tilted my head back and breathing in the warm Georgia air as the sun began its decent in the distance. I didn't think we had been gone all that long, but the way the sky suddenly was filled with pinks and oranges, I guessed we would make it back just in time for dinner. We were probably ten minutes away from the prison when I felt Rick's hand reach to intertwine with mine. I couldn't hide my surprise when I turned to look at him, wondering what was going through his mind. Meeting his gaze, I wasn't expecting to see the pain clearly showing in his eyes. I searched harder, trying to see if there was any hope for him to be happy again. As I held his gaze his eyes slowly softened, shining with passion, almost as though he were trying to show me there was hope. That part seemed to shine brighter, finally lighting up his eyes when I brought his hand up, pressing my lips softly against his knuckles as I, once again, tasted the salt and musk of his skin. I held his hand against my mouth a moment longer than before, and rather then letting it go, I lowered our connected hands so they were resting on my chest, letting him feel the soft flutter as my heartbeat quickened. A soft smile spread across his lips as he let his hand rest there, never breaking eye contact as I leaned into him, resting my head on his shoulder. In this short moment we allowed ourselves to be vulnerable to one another, I knew I shouldn't expect it to happen again, so I turned my head lightly as I took in a deep breath, inhaling his scent and creating my own little forever in the few minutes we had left together.<p>

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><p>So I had wanted to wait a bit for any real intimate moment to happen between the two of them, but as I wrote it this it kind of just happened and felt right. I can warn you all now that the next few chapters will be more focused on Emma and the others rather than Emma and Rick. The time lapse is going to quicken up a bit so that we get closer to season 4 and all of the good stuff, but in the meantime I really wanted them to have a vulnerable and very real moment together. Let me know what you think, who you want to see more of in the next few chapters and so on. Thanks again for all your support! Favfollow and review! Cheers.


	10. Family

**Shadow knight1121: Thanks for all your reviews, they keep me going and make me happy to see that you've stuck around so far! Keep 'em coming! :) **

**thepencilunleashed: thanks for your reviews and thanks for following my story, I'm so excited to see it picking up and getting so much more attention. **

**DanathaKettu: thanks for the support, hope you enjoy the upcoming chapters! **

**Guest(s): Thanks for finding the time to get in a review, every little bit helps keep me inspired and posting the next chapter. **

**Sorry if i missed anyone, i'm just really excited to post this chapter and get to work on the next few, cause shit's going to hit the fan. I'm hoping to wrap up the in-between season story soon, and start season 4, but i also don't want to rush it because i have a certain place I want all these characters at before i get there, so I'm sorry if this is dragging on. Thanks everyone for all the support and reviews and so on, it's really great to see all this great feedback on my first fanfic. Anyway sorry for the long note, I usually don't write a lot up here. Anyway enjoy! **

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><p>The sun was finishing it's decent, drawing back it's purple and pink hues and leaving the night sky in darkness. The stars had begun to pop out, one by one as I found myself climbing back up into the guard tower a few days after Daryl had taken us on the hunt. It had become my place of refuge, a place I often went to when I needed to think or just get away from the claustrophobic feeling of my cell. The sun's warmth long gone, leaving us in the cool crisp winter evening. I sat out on the balcony, dangling my feet over the edge as I clutched onto my warm fleece sweater for warmth. Below me a fire was coming to life as Maggie, Glenn and Beth all surrounded it seeking its warmth. In the distance a few others were coming to join, eagerly searching for the heat it provided. I smiled down at my friends as they gathered around with laughter, telling stories and hearing Beth share a song. As her angelic voice sang over the crackling of the fire, I looked away and towards the graveyard where I had caught movement from the corner of my eye. Rick was pacing in front of his wife's grave; lips moving as he spoke in hurried and hush tones. No one else seemed to notice him, or at least pretended not to. I watched as he came to a stop, reaching for the cross and holding it gently as his other hand reached up to pinch the bridge of his nose between his index finger and thumb. From the angle I was watching him it was hard to make out anything he was saying, but he didn't stay still for very long, turning around abruptly and joining the group around the fire. I looked away as he approached, not wanting to get caught spying on his intimate moment, though feeling his eyes on me as he took his place between Carl and Beth. I could hear Judith's soft giggles and looked over at the child as she wiggled happily in Beth's arms.<p>

"You wanna hold her Emma?" Beth asked suddenly. My eyes shifted up in surprise as I met Beth's gaze, a small smile on her lips as she gestured for me to come down. Giving Rick a glance to make sure it was okay, I hurried to join the others below when he gave a soft distracted nod.

"Just make sure you support her head," Beth whispered encouragingly as she passed the baby over to me. I could feel everyone's eyes on me, watching curiously as I smiled down at the little human in my arms.

"Hey," I cooed down as Judith smiled brightly in my arms, her arms flailing wildly as she let out a gleeful shriek.

"She likes you," Beth moved over, letting me sit in between her and Rick as I clutched the child closer, letting her wrap her tiny fingers around one of mine. She seemed completely transfixed by the one finger she now had firmly in her grasp as she talked in bubbly tones, telling her own story about what she was seeing. Most of the others had drifted into their own conversations, but a few still watched me carefully and I wondered what I must have looked like to them. I glanced up at Rick as Judith giggled joyfully and continued trying to form her own words. He was looking at us curiously, a look on his face as though he had just realized something. His eyes looked up from his daughter in my arms and met my gaze, a small smile on his lips.

"She does," Rick agreed with Beth's last statement, not breaking his gaze from mine as he spoke gruffly. A light blush crept to my cheeks from his intense stare, and I looked back down at Judith, laughing lightly as I noticed her eyes drooping and head dipping as she began to fall asleep. It didn't take long before the little one finally gave in and shut her eyes, a soft snore escaping her parted lips.

"She's beautiful," I murmured. I wasn't sure if anyone had heard me, and I didn't care. I had never held Judith before, never seen her as closely as I was now. Her brown hair had a reddish tint, and the eyes that were open a moment ago were a chocolate brown. Her cheeks were splotched with a rose color, no doubt from the cold, and so I hugged her closer, smiling when I saw the slight twitch on her lips from the movement.

"Do you want her?" I glanced over at Rick, who still hadn't taken his eyes of either of us. He glanced up from his daughter, now in a peaceful slumber, and shook his head.

"She seems quite content where she is," he smiled, looking down at Judith once more with soft eyes before turning away and joining in conversation with Glenn and Carl.

"She's a heavy sleeper," Beth said softly, I met her kind smile with one of my own, noticing the motherly gaze she held on Judith. It was no secret that Beth was Judith's caregiver, the go to if you had any questions about the baby. Beth seemed to enjoy it though, always offering to look after the little human day and night.

"Probably the only one of us here who _can_ sleep through the night," I laughed lightly, reaching a finger to stroke her soft cheek. Knowing I was being watched, I glanced up and saw Beth's wondering eyes as she studied me.

"You're hard to read," she finally said when I raised my eyebrow, questioning her unwavering stare.

"What do you mean?" I shifted away so I could turn to face her, my eyes narrowing as I tried to imagine where she was going with this.

"It's just," Beth sat back, looking over the fire as she chose her words, "you're so closed off here, and at first I wrote it off as you were still learning to trust us, and despite the fact that you go out on these runs with Rick and Daryl you still act as if you're walking on eggshells around us."

I wasn't sure how to react, but I could tell by the way she turned to look at me she was hoping for an explanation, to get to know me since she was clearly having trouble. I looked away, uncomfortable now that the attention was on me, and even more uncomfortable because I had no idea what to say.

"I'm sorry, I'm not usually so forward. I just notice those kinds of things and... I wanted to make sure you knew that this is your home now. We are your family," Beth spoke more softly, her gaze unwavering as she smiled when she finished talking. I looked back over the fire, feeling many eyes on me as Beth made the statement I was sure so many of them were thinking themselves. I knew I wouldn't get away without an answer, not fast enough at least now that I was holding Judith.

"I guess when you spend a couple years out there with those things coming after you day after day, knowing only instincts; only what it takes to survive, you forget how to be around people," I kept my eyes on Judith, not trusting my voice not to break under Beth's always understanding gaze, "I guess I'm still trying to remember how to be the girl I was before all this."

"That's the thing," Maggie's voice drifted into our conversation, my eyes snapping up to meet hers as she looked at us thoughtfully, "we don't get to be who we were, we get to be who we need to be. What I think is that maybe... Emma, maybe that being out there on your own for so long…you put yourself into some kind of denial; tried to hold on to the woman you were before this in an effort to avoid facing the loss of everyone you knew. And seeing us, seeing Grace, you realized it's okay to change, to move on. You're just still learning how."

I had to look away, and was happy when Beth reached for Judith, as if sensing my need to escape.

"I am, still learning I mean, and I'm grateful for the opportunity you all have given me," I smiled at Beth and Maggie, ignoring the prying eyes around us. I didn't want to leave without saying anything; I felt it was too immature to just leave when I knew they were just trying to get to know the newest addition. I gave them a soft nod as I stood, fighting back the tears I knew wanted to break free as I turned my back to them and wandered off towards an empty corner of the field. No one followed me right away, instead I heard the fire get put out as well as a few voices calling out good night as I found a nice enough spot shielded by some tall grass to let the tears fall. They were right, and I was stupid for not realizing it sooner. It wasn't so much that everyone I knew was gone, but rather that as well as my brother, I had lost something else. I could never bring myself to say or think about it, but I acknowledged it being there, I acknowledged the fact that I was using my brothers death to distract me from the greatest loss I'd ever felt. Before I could think too much about it, I heard footsteps approaching, and rubbed my eyes quickly to try and hide the tears that I had let fall freely.

"Hey I thought I'd walk you back inside, didn't want you falling asleep out in the cold," Maggie's voice spoke softly. I nodded, rubbing the tears from my eyes again and reaching for the hand Maggie extended out to me, grateful as she helped me up and wrapped a soothing arm around my waist as she supported me.

"Sorry," I murmured as I stumbled into her.

"Don't worry about it, it's been a long day," Maggie smiled over at me. I wasn't comfortable being babied so I stopped and re adjusted myself, trying to ignore her sad stare as I did so. Once I drew in a deep breath and knew I could walk on alone, I nodded at her as we started at a slow pace on our way to the prison.

"Is Beth always so blunt?" I finally asked as Maggie pulled aside the gate. She chuckled and looked back at me with a shake of her head.

"Not usually, I mean not at first. She was always a pain in my ass when we were younger. Always telling me what was on her mind when she ought to just have kept it to herself. When Rick's group met up with us, you could say I was grateful she kind of kept more to herself," Maggie mused, her eyes focusing on something distant as she dug through her memory, "she was so shy when they came, kept to herself and shadowed Patricia like a lost puppy. Then they found the walkers…"

I looked over, slowing my pace when I noticed Maggie's voice crack.

"What happened?" I asked, unsure if I was going to get a reply.

"We kept them in our barn, mom…Sean…other friends and family," She sniffed, coming to a stop beside the gated entrance, "they were long gone, but daddy liked keeping them around. Hoped one day they would come back again. After Rick found out, they whole lot of them shot every last one of them down. Including Sophia…"

"Sophia?" Maggie looked over, shocked, and she stumbled to find words. I guessed she hadn't meant to let that name slip, and didn't know how to go into the details of the sad story.

"My daughter," Carol appeared behind us, a frown appeared on her face as she listened to our conversation.

"She…" I couldn't bring myself to say it, but Carol shrugged.

"She died, and came back as one of those things. Rick dealt with it when the others couldn't," She smiled softly, but it didn't reach her eyes as she spoke.

"After that, Beth wasn't the same, lost herself," Maggie continued, trying her best to avoid talking about Carol's daughter.

"Since then she's come a long way, proven herself to be a strong member of the group," Carol inserted with a light nudge towards Maggie.

"We all have," Maggie said finally, "all of us have changed for the better."

I felt her eyes on me, knowing she directed it towards me, reminding me of the conversation from earlier.

"Couldn't agree more," Carol nodded, smiling at the both of us.

"Maggie?" Glenn's voice broke the silence as he hurried out of the cellblock to find her. He didn't get that far before coming to a relieved stop when he spotted us around the corner, "You said you were right behind me, I got worried."

"My little worrier," Maggie teased, pulling him away and up the stairs, calling out a quick goodnight before disappearing into the prison with a trail of giggles.

"They're so happy," I commented, feeling a slight pang of jealousy as I watched them walk away happily hand in hand.

"They deserve it," Carol shrugged again, a knowing look on her face as she looked between me and the doorway Maggie and Glenn had retreated into, "you'll get that too one day."

"I wouldn't be so sure," I mumbled, hugging myself from the cold breeze that had crept its way over us.

"You'll find it," she smiled wider, "at the right time, with the right person. Something tells me you may already have your eye on that person already."

I wasn't surprised by her comment, Carol was careful to notice these things. She always seemed to be watching Grace and me carefully. Being under her watch I didn't feel like I was being scrutinized, but looked after. Something about Carol had always had me feeling like she was a natural mother, and now I knew she had been.

"I wouldn't be so sure," I repeated quietly. Carol watched me sadly, reaching out and wrapping her arms around me. I tensed up at first; I had never been comforted like this, not in a long time. Carol kept her hold on me, waiting until I returned the embrace, and though it took a minute, I finally lifted my arms and brought her closer. I didn't think I had any tears left, but a few more fell and she was quick to soothe me when she felt her shoulder dampen from the few that fell there. We stood like that for a few minutes, I didn't sob or make any noise, just let the remainder of my tears fall and hold her tight in a much-needed comforting hug. She pulled me away, wiping my eyes and cheeks for me before holding us at arms length.

"I'm always here for you, and Grace of course, but I feel like you need to hear it more than her," Carol smiled, "I like you, Emma, and I would hate to see you lose yourself because you feel like you're alone, when you're not."

"Thanks, Carol," A final tear fell at her words, but neither of us moved to wipe it away, "I guess I always knew that, but hearing it…it makes more real."

"We're your family now," Carol affirmed, patting me gently on the back.

"Heading in, ladies?" Rick asked, him and Daryl heading out of the cellblock and coming to a stop next to Carol and I. She dropped her arms from my side, turning to face the two of them as they approached, "it's getting colder, we can probably expect snow soon."

"Thinking of doing a few more runs? Before the weather turns?" Carol asked worriedly, glancing between Daryl and Rick.

"Yeah," Rick glanced over, our eyes locked, "was hoping you would join us again. We're thinking we'll leave in two days, be gone overnight, you up for it?"

"Of course," I didn't have to think about it, "Anything you need, I'm more than happy to have a way to help the group."

"Good," Daryl grunted, "your skills might come in handy out there, we need to scrounge up some more ammo. Time to get creative with taking those bastards out."

"We'll discuss it more tomorrow, we're still mapping out some locations and getting a group together," Rick smiled, nodding at Carol and I before he and Daryl walked away, continuing their conversation.

"_Anything you need_," she mocked, nudging me playfully with a giggle. I rolled my eyes, grinning as we walked into the cellblock.

"Oh, shut up."

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><p><strong>I haven't watched the newest episode, I'm so nervous about it after everything that happened last episode so i've just been putting it off. I'll eventually get around to it, especially if this story keeps going. Anyway don't forget to followfav and review! Cheers. **


	11. Separated

Thanks again for all the support, my views are rising like crazy and my followers are slowly increasing. It's so exciting to see this kind of response, and i hope you guys enjoy this next chapter.

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><p>The plan was simple. Head to a pharmacy a few clicks out, get some medicine and formula, get out. Although Daryl explained it easily, as though it was the simplest task in the world, I couldn't shake the feeling something was going to mess up our 'simple' plan. I glanced out the window, seeing a few walkers eagerly dragging their feet towards us, but the car was easily going 80mph, the world whizzed past us and so did the walkers. They didn't stand a chance.<p>

"You nervous?" Daryl asked over the soft hum of the vehicle. I glanced over, giving the hunter a brief once over as he drove casually in his leather kutte, his outfit never seemed to change. We were sitting in the light green Hyundai, I had shotgun while Tyreese and Maggie sat squished in the back. The truck ahead of us carrying Rick and Glenn.

"No, I don't know…" I shrugged, looking out the window, "can't shake the feeling something bad is going to happen, but I guess when you're constantly on the run from zombies you're always going to have that feeling."

Daryl's nose scrunched at the word _zombies_, I knew it was a word we tried to avoid because it sounded so artificial, like the world was playing some cruel and twisted joke on us.

"We'll be fine, in and out. Like usual," he mumbled, moving in his seat to get more comfortable for the long drive. I watched as he moved, catching on to the way he turned slightly so his back was more towards us. In Daryl's mind the conversation was over, his word was final. I looked away, pressing my head against the cool glass of the window, gazing out at the frost that clung to the nature around us; god I hoped he was right.

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><p>Rick and Daryl reminded us of the plan as we gathered between the two vehicles and took in our surroundings. The pharmacy was a large building, surely it would take all of us to look through it in order to make it out in good time. However Rick was insistent on having a separate group look at a building further off before joining with his group in the pharmacy. It was a risky job and by the size of the small grocery store across the parking lot, it wouldn't take too many hands to search. Daryl was the first to volunteer, and Rick nodded as though he had expected that.<p>

"I'll go with, Dixon," I stepped forward from Maggie's side, ignoring her hand as it grazed mine when she attempted to reach for me. Rick frowned, brow furrowed as he considered my offer. He wasn't expecting _that_.

"You sure, Emma?" he asked slowly, glancing to Daryl who nodded slightly. He'd seen my handy work, and it made me feel good to know he trusted having me watch his back.

"Yes," I nodded once, keeping my eyes locked with Ricks. I didn't give him any reason to doubt me, and was relieved to see him finally relent with a sigh.

"Okay, be careful," he said to the both of us, but I felt his eyes linger on me a moment longer than necessary.

"Sure, no problem," Daryl was quick to burst into action, slinging his crossbow from around his back and holding it firmly below his hip as he started his way across the parking lot. Reaching for my blade, I quickly hurried to his side, glancing around and noticing a few walkers laying dead in front of the grocery store as we got closer. Each of them had a head wound, a sign someone had obviously been here before us and taken them out. I frowned, looking over to Daryl and saw he noticed it too. We slowed down, ducking behind a dusty black Camaro.

"Nice car," I noted, hearing his smirk before he signaled me to follow him. We walked through the double doors, his crossbow at the ready and my knife held tightly in my hand. We heard a rustling in the distance, followed by a few choice cuss words. Daryl glanced at me, nodding at one of the cashier pods. I shook my head, ready to argue his signal for me to hide while he dealt with whoever was hiding in the shelves. His jaw clenched, reminding me he was in charge and this wasn't the time to pick a fight. With a sigh, I slowly made my way to the pod, but a movement in the distance had me freeze in place.

"Holy shit, Zach she's alive!" A young blonde smiled widely, standing a few feet across from me with a crowbar in hand. The weapon already covered in blood and innards. Another man appeared, a little taller than the blonde. His hair was darker, he had a pale face and wide grey eyes.

"Jesus," he whispered, raising his hands in surrender as he walked slowly towards me, "hey sorry, lady. We didn't mean to scare you; we're just trying to pick up some supplies. We mean no harm."

"Best back off, _dude_," Daryl warned, hurrying to my side with his crossbow raised. The boy, who I assumed to be Zach, quickly came to a stop, his wide eyes looking up to the man standing in front of me.

"Hey man, sorry, look we aren't trying to cause any trouble," Zach said and as he spoke I noticed the slight accent in his voice, while I would have assumed it to be English, I wasn't about to ask.

"Just you two?" Daryl's eyes narrowed at the two of them. Zach shook his head, calling out for one more guy to show himself. It was a stupid call. Had Daryl and I been asking for other reasons, their friend who had been perfectly safe, would now have a target on him. Daryl grunted as the other young man appeared, arms up as he stood next to his friends. The crossbow was lowered as Daryl asked them a few more questions, three to be exact. They relaxed as Daryl explained our situation, the prison and the safety it provided. They were eager to join, nodding their heads as they came closer, relieved smiles on their faces.

"Man you have no idea how long we've been riding out on our own, for a second I thought we were it," Zach smiled, waving his arms around as he gestured towards his friends.

"Well you ain't anymore," Daryl grunted, the moment was quickly over as Daryl instructed the other two to go and search one half of the store while he, Zach, and I search the other. We were just in the middle of talking about the prison when Zach turned to us, a big goofy grin on his lips.

"So…Daryl, what were you before all this?" Zach asked, leaning against a shelf as he eyed the cans in front of him, quickly stuffing them in his pack before looking back over at the hunter.

"What?" Daryl asked, slightly annoyed by the teenagers nonchalance and personal question.

"I mean, come on, you are one badass looking dude. I bet you were a pro wrestler or something…right?" Zach looked over, checking to see if his guess was right. Daryl scoffed, a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth as he considered the idea.

"Daryl… a pro wrestler…" I mused, feeling my smile grow wider as I toyed with it.

"What's wrong with that?" Daryl snapped, but his smile was playful as he looked at me.

"Nothing, I just didn't picture you as the type," I shrugged, filling my own pack with a few cans.

"Yeah, whatever," he mumbled, looking away and stepping further down the aisle as he examined the few remaining contents on the shelves.

"So, it that a no?" Zach asked me, eyebrow raised as he grinned.

"Definitely a no," I confirmed with a nod. Zach looked up at me then, but something behind me caught his attention and I watched as his eyes widen, raising a pointed finger at something outside. I turned around, a gasp escaping my lips as I saw the walkers approaching. It was a large heard, at least a hundred made their way through the parking lot, passing by the pharmacy and making their way towards the grocery store we were in. Most of them had already rounded the store, making their way to the woods behind the building, but a few had turned their attention to the small grocery store and pressed themselves against the large glass windows, clawing at it hungrily as though they already knew we were here.

"Shit," I hissed, backing away and trying to keep myself out of sight. They had seen us already, and at the jingle of the door, I knew some had found their way inside. Our group split up, hurrying to hide from the walkers as their groans and hisses got closer. I ran, finding my way into the back and locking myself into the bathroom. I smiled at myself, feeling proud of acting so quickly, but the smile quickly faded when I realized I had locked myself inside this building with these things, with no vantage point, and no way to know when it was clear to leave. The room was dark and cold, not the most comfortable place to hide. Reaching for my backpack, I was happy to find the few cans and one water bottle I had in there. It would last me a while if it came down to that. Pulling out my flashlight, I brought the light up to a vent, and was happy to see it was a good size, one that I could escape into. I stayed there for a few minutes, pressed against the door as I listened to the shuffling outside the door. Every now and then the handle would jiggle a bit or one of them would press against the door, which caused my heart to race and my breath to catch as I waited for them to move on. I didn't worry about Daryl, knowing full well the man had probably escaped outside or found a perfect hiding place in the store and was waiting for it to clear out just as I was. He was smart; he knew how to survive. It was the other boys I was worried about; Zach had looked so frightened when he'd seen the herd that I was worried he might have been clumsy in finding a good place to hide. The fact that I hadn't heard any screams or cries for help told me they were all safe, at least any who were in side. I let that thought calm me as I repeated it over and over in my head. We were safe; we were going to make it out of here. I was going to see Grace again; I was going to see Rick again. All the friends i had made back at the camp, I'd see them all again. This wasn't the end of my line; this was just a small hiccup I knew I would get out of eventually. The thoughts scattered around my head as I felt my eyelids get heavy. I hadn't slept well the night before, and I could feel the exhaustion creep over me as I relaxed against the door. Without seeing it coming, sleep easily overtook me, putting me into a deep slumber.

A loud pounding on the door jolted me awake. At first I panicked, the dark room had fooled me into thinking I had lost my sight. When I turned my head and caught sight of the light peeking under the door, I snapped out of it and lifted myself off the ground. I waited, unsure if I should open the door, but when I waited to see if another knock would come, and it didn't, my hand slid off the knob and I back away from the door. A few growls came from behind the door, and I could see the shadows of the walkers as they dragged passed my hiding place. I waited a moment, and once I was sure I was safe, I un did the lock and opened the door slowly. Adrenaline shot through me as a walker quickly filled the open space and lunged for my flesh. I closed the door hard on it's neck, listening to the crunch as his neck snapped. The bone was visible now puncturing through his flesh, his head lopped to the side and his body fell. He still snapped at me, but I brought my boot down on his head roughly, a satisfied smile tugging on my lips when I heard his growls cease with a final blow. I caught sight of a few more in the distance, and decided against sticking around to fight them off. I crouched down as I made my way through the storage area, finally coming to the back door and opening it quickly. I glanced around the back, relieved to find the loading bay empty and made my way down the path before peeking around the corner. The sun had begun to set, and I knew many hours had slipped by when I passed out in the bathroom. I mentally kicked myself for being so stupid. A few walkers wandered around the parking lot, nothing I couldn't handle. My gaze drifted further, and I felt my stomach drop when I saw the two cars my group had arrived in that morning were no longer in the parking lot. A hand pressed down on my shoulder, and I reached for my knife as I spun around and raised it high, ready to dig it into the walkers skull. The tip had just broken skin when I saw that the hand on me didn't belong to a walker, but rather Zach, who was still very much alive.

"Hey!" he shouted, pushing my hand away before reaching up to touch his wound, eyes growing wide when he saw the blood, "what the hell?"

"Sorry!" I quickly stepped forward as I apologized, rubbing the small bit of blood that trailed from his forehead. The cut wasn't bad at all, but I was sure he'd play it out as long as he could.

"Last time I sneak up on you," he muttered, I glanced over his shoulder; noticing Zach was a few men short.

"Where are your friends?" I asked, Zach looked behind him with a shrug.

"I heard that Daryl guy guide them out of here, said he'd take them back to his group, that it wasn't safe here," Zack spoke softly. I knew he was trying to make it out as no big deal but I could see the hurt in his eyes, "I got stuck in the vent I was hiding, and didn't want to make any noise that could get them into trouble. When they left I realized I hadn't heard you with them, figured I could find you and still have a shot at being rescued."

"Of course," I smiled, looking back over my shoulder with a frown. Sure we could handle the walkers, but I had no idea how we were going to get all the way back to the prison. We were too far to make it back before nightfall, "It just might be a little hard finding a ride."

"No need," Zach chuckled, my eyes snapped back over to him as he lifted a pair of keys out of his pocket with a grin, he clicked the button and I heard a loud chirp from the parking lot. Seeing the lights to the black Camaro flash had filled me with too much excitement to scold Zach for drawing attention to us. We quickly ran over to the car, climbing in as a few walkers got closer.

"Nice car," I breathed as he turned the key, the engine came to life and we sped away. I glanced over my shoulder, and frowned as the parking lot disappeared from my view. They all thought we were dead, no doubt. I just hoped that we could make it back in one piece. The image of Rick and Grace standing there with waiting arms brought a small smile to my lips. It was a reunion I was looking forward to having. Zach asked for directions and I did my best to map it out for him, pressing my head against the window as I let the tension and fear from the day slip away. We were going home.

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><p>I know it doesn't have a lot of RickEmma interaction, but that's going to change within the next few chapters. Thanks again for all your support, don't forget to review, follow and fav! Cheers.


	12. An Explanation

I think this is the most time I've gone without updating, this chapter was a little more difficult to write as I'm trying to make them longer. But I hope you all enjoy it and I look forward to hearing back from all of you.

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><p>The darkness surrounding the car was slightly unsettling as we turned down the final road leading to the prison. Zack was still going on about how excited he was to meet everyone, asking endless amounts of questions and continuously reminding me of his hope that his friends had made it out alive. My knee was shaking slightly as my foot twitched uncomfortably; this guy was starting to get real annoying, real fast. As much as I liked Zack, I wasn't overly fond of spending a long period of time in a confined vehicle with him as he talked for the entire trip. Perhaps it was just my nerves, I assumed everyone had been told I was dead by now, and my thoughts kept drifting to Grace. Would she be okay? Sure it would only be a few hours until we'd be reunited but the girl had a knack for getting into trouble, more so now that she was spending more time with the young Grimes boy. I could only hope that Carol would be there to comfort her until I arrived. Seeing the large building come into view had my entire body flooding with relief. I was getting antsy. Zack wasn't driving fast enough, and now it seemed to take Tyreese forever to open the front gate. I nodded at him, ignoring the shocked expression on his face as we drove past.<p>

"Just follow the path up to the second gate, then cut the engine," I hoped Zack would hear the urgency in my voice, but his goofy grin only grew wider as he crawled the car towards the entrance. Letting out an annoyed huff, I opened the door, ignoring the sounds of his protest. Despite the fact that the car was moving and that I was easily one of the clumsiest people in the world, I managed to maneuver out of the car and raced towards the opening gate. Sasha and Daryl stood looking completely shocked as I approached, behind them I could see Maggie, Glenn and a few others hurry towards me. Before I could get past the hunter, he pulled me in roughly from the side, hugging me against his chest for a fraction of a second before releasing me.

"Thought you were dead," he said gruffly.

"Well I'm not," I smiled forcefully, looking past him and the oncoming crowd. I couldn't see any sign of Grace and the worry was starting to grow.

"She's inside, with Carol and Beth," Daryl pushed me towards the prison, eyeing Zack as he climbed out of his car and hugged his friends with a loud laugh. I was grateful that the others let me pass, not bothering to ask what had happened or where I had been. There was only one person I wanted to see right now. As I walked into the common area, I wasn't expecting the mass amounts of greetings I received as I walked past. To be honest, I was surprised to see these people knew who I was, and even more surprised by the relieved expression they all shared when they saw me standing there alive and unscathed. I smiled at them as I hurried past the small group and picking up my pace as I hurried towards my cell. The sound of Grace's sobs had me freeze in place when I reached the entrance to our room. Carol was sitting on my bed, Grace's head in her lap as the young girl cried. Beth watched from the corner, soothing the sleeping baby as she offered a few comforting words to the distraught girl. Carol was the first one who noticed me standing there, after the shock settled, her expression shifted to a knowing smile. She looked down, whispering something softly to Grace before standing up and coming to wrap her arms around me tightly. Grace didn't move, her back still to us as we embraced. Beth's mouth had opened slightly when she saw me, a wide smile spreading on her mouth when the surprise finally passed.

"Emma," she breathed, looking over at Grace expectantly. Carol pulled away, and we all watched as Grace sniffled quietly and turned towards us. I watched as she rubbed her eyes hard as she took in the sight of me. It was clear she wasn't sure if I was really standing there, but when I raised my arms and lowered myself slightly, she wasted no time in closing the unnecessary space between us. I could have kept her in my arms for the rest of the night. Feeling Grace wrap her arms around me tightly reminded me how lucky I was to be alive, and of the fact that I had something to live for. Sure Grace and I hadn't known each other long, but something about the bond that developed between us seemed almost natural. Carol and Beth joined in after a few minutes, all of us sobbing softly as we held tightly to one another. Finally Grace and I pulled away from each other and I glanced over to the sleeping baby in Beth's arms.

"May I?" I asked with a smile. Judith was carefully placed into my arms, and as I gazed down at the beautiful baby I realized just how much each of these people in this prison meant to me. How I would do anything to protect them, and how distraught I would be if anything should happen to them. Grace hugged my side as we both looked down at the baby happily. I moved into the cell, finding a warm spot on my mattress and settling in.

"What happened out there?" Carol finally asked. I looked up, a frown setting on my lips as I thought back to the scenario I had found myself in only a few hours ago.

"A herd came through, I got separated from Daryl and the newbies. Locked myself in a bathroom, I don't know what happened, if it was just exhaustion or what but I passed out, woke up an hour or so later and found Zack," I mentally kicked myself at the memory, the fact that I had fallen asleep while being attacked by walkers still embarrassed me, but I shrugged it off as sleep deprivation and the fact that I had been pushing to prove myself around the prison a lot over the past few weeks. I just hoped the others would understand.

"You fell _asleep?_" Carol whispered harshly, eyebrows rising in shock.

"I don't know what happened, one minute I was fine and the next I could barely keep my eyes open," My voice cracked as I spoke, seeing Carol's anger had me feeling like I should keep the information to myself when someone asked me next.

"The important thing is she's back now," Beth interjected nervously, eyes lingering on Judith in my arms.

"You're right," Carol nodded, an annoyed sigh escaping her lips before turning back to me with a softer expression, "Just…maybe leave that detail out when you tell the others."

I nodded quickly; she didn't have to tell me twice. The little human squirmed in my arms, a soft whimper echoing around the prison walls as she woke.

"I can feed her," I could see Beth's arms drop as I said it, a frown forming on her mouth at my insistence. I looked up at her, giving her a reassuring nod. She still seemed hesitant as I left my cell, Grace sticking wordlessly to my side as we walked into the hall and over to the kitchen set up. Grace could see that my hands were full, and so prepared the bottle without me asking as I sat at the table across from her. The room was empty; most of the others had wandered off to bed or to their watch.

"Emma?" a startled voice called from the entrance. I turned, expecting the voice to belong to Rick, but surprised when I saw Carl's wide eyes looking back at me.

"She's alive!" Grace smiled, hugging me gently before putting the bottle into my hands and walking over to the young boy. His eyes never leaving mine as he spoke to her in hurried hushed tones. The way he looked at me…it was almost fearful. I shrugged it off, looking back down at the child in my arms as she greedily drank from the warm bottle.

"What was his problem?" I muttered as Grace wandered back over, sitting down next to me and tickling Judith's feet.

"Just surprised that you were alive, like everyone else," she shrugged, "I'm going to bed, promised Carol I'd help her first thing in the morning."

"Mm'kay, goodnight," I reached over, planting a light kiss on her cheek just before she hurried away.

"Emma?" Beth's voice broke the moment of silence following Grace's exit as she walked into the room. I looked over, smiling as the young girl approached.

"What's up?" I asked, watching as she glanced between the baby and I.

"Sorry, I know you just left, and I wanted to give you a moment without worrying you. I just came to ask if you might go find Rick…he left as soon as the group returned and no one has seen him since," Beth said worriedly, looking over towards the door leading further into the prison.

"He's been gone that long?" My voice cracked, my words barely coming out as a whisper. I glanced down at the now sleeping child in my arms, hugging her close for comfort as I tried to ease my worry.

"Yeah," Beth sighed, "he did this once before, it's not as bad but I think he was a little upset about losing another member of the group. Reminded him of it all."

"Lori?" I asked, expecting the sad nod she did in reply.

"Like I said, it's not as bad as before, but he's come too far from all that. I'm just worried about Carl and Judith, they can't lose him again," she mumbled.

"Okay," I nodded, standing up, "I'll go find him."

"Want me to take Judith?" Beth asked, eyes lighting up as I slowly handed over the baby.

"She's a little cutie, huh?" I laughed softly, rubbing my finger over her rosy cheeks.

"The cutest," Beth agreed, "Better go find Rick before Carl gets worried, I'll keep him busy in the meantime."

"Something tells me Grace might already have that taken care of," I muttered, lifting myself off the seat and made my way over to the doorway before waving goodbye to Beth.

* * *

><p>The corridor was dark; my flashlight was giving off only enough light to see a few feet in front of me. My first guess was the boiler room, and as I walked into it I couldn't ignore the eerie feeling that crept over me. Winter was at our doorstep, the air was getting crisp and the snow was starting to stick. I blamed the chills that crept over me as I walked through the cramped room on the cooler weather, justifying it with the fact that my breath was visible in a thick smoke like gust when I exhaled. I made the search quick, my teeth had begun to chatter and the shakes were becoming harder to control by the time I left and made my way to the laundry room. Again there was no sign of Rick, and my hopes to find him waned. I hugged myself tighter as I wandered back to the cellblock, stopping to check the engine room briefly before giving up. I was ashamed that the cold was at fault for causing me to cease my search, and on the way back I debated running to my room and grabbing a jacket before continuing. I was only a few minutes from the cellblock when a shuffling to my right caught my attention and had me stop. I tried to quiet my breathing, clenching my teeth together so my teeth would stop shaking and holding my ear against the door next to me. A loud bang erupted in the room and I flinched away from the noise.<p>

"Shit," a voice muttered from the other side. It was hard to tell if it was Rick but I opened the door slowly anyway, curious to find out what was going on.

"Is everything…?" I trailed off, my eyes catching sight of the bookshelves. There were two lamps in the room, lighting up the image before me as I stepped in and began to examine the copies of novels in front of me. My excitement at seeing the library had prevented me from seeing the small bookshelf that had been knocked over. Rick was standing behind it, breathlessly staring at me as I smiled at the individual books in my hands.

"Emma?" He asked, pulling my focus from the paperbacks.

"Rick," I whispered, the light in the room was weak, but enough that I could see the sweat gleaming on his skin and the utter shock written all over his pale face.

"How…?" he asked, unable to move as he blinked hard. I knew he was doing the same thing Grace had done when she saw me as he lifted his hand and rubbed the heel of his palm roughly against his eyes. I couldn't find my voice, instead walking over to his side and wrapping my arms around his middle. I meant it as a gesture to comfort him, but sighed happily when I found his body was hot against my cold skin. He made no move to neither return the gesture nor move away from it.

"Are you real?" he asked, his hands finally coming up and stroking my back softly as though he were afraid I would break or disappear from his touch. The warmth his body provided me had given me enough strength to talk again, and I nodded my head against his chest.

"I'm here, I'm okay," I mumbled into his shirt. As if those were the magic words, his arms wrapped around my shoulders and waist, pressing us tighter together.

"I thought you were dead, Daryl said you…" he choked, digging his fingers into my skin as he recalled the memory.

"It's okay…I'm here, Rick, I'm here," I soothed, rubbing my hand on his stomach. He relaxed at my touch, burying his head into my messy hair.

"I'm so sorry we left you," Rick whispered.

"It's okay, I'm here now," I repeated, feeling myself sink into him deeper. I couldn't deny the tingles his touch sent fluttering through me, or the way hearing his voice break caused me pain. It was too fast; I knew that. The way I had fallen for him in the past few weeks was too fast, but somehow I had convinced myself that it was okay, that as long as I was the only one who knew than that was okay.

I pulled away when I felt his arms start to drop, frowning slightly when we had completely separated from one another. My skin craved his touch, but I did my best to ignore it as I backed away and pressed against a table for support, hoping that the electricity swirling inside me would cease; it didn't.

"What happened out there?" He asked, leaning back against a bookshelf as he tried to collect himself.

"I got separated from the others, locked myself in a room. I was surrounded and so I had to wait them out. By the time I finally got out of there, everyone had gone and Zack and I were all that was left," I left out the few details Carol instructed, watching as Rick nodded and let out a long sigh after listening.

"I'm sorry," he frowned, "Daryl said he saw you run off, saw a few walkers go after you and figured you'd been taken out or managed to escape out the back. But the herd was back there so he thought you were dead."

"It's fine Rick, it wasn't safe, you couldn't risk going back to look for one person, I know how it works," I reasoned, pulling myself up to sit on the table in the middle of the room.

"I should have gone back," he insisted, his thumb and index finger pinching the bridge of his nose. His eyes shut tightly as he thought back, "I should have checked for myself."

"What's done is done," I sighed, "I'm safe, and I'm home." His eyes snapped open, a small smile tugging on his lips as he looked over at me.

"Yes, you are."

* * *

><p>After a long, drawn out silence, Rick had offered to walk me back to my room. Our walk was nice and quiet as we walked through the cellblock and towards my room.<p>

"Goodnight," I murmured as I walked ahead of him and reached to open the cell door. His hand caught my arm and he tugged me into his side roughly, leading me off to the side so we were out of earshot.

"I just," Rick started, glancing around nervously, "I'm just happy that you're okay."

"Me too…" I smiled, looking around awkwardly to see what had him on edge. The entire cellblock was empty, soft snores filled the room as the others slept, completely unaware of the exchange between Rick and I taking place below.

"Okay," he nodded; pulling his hands into his pockets as she slowly backed away, "goodnight."

"Goodnight," I whispered, gasping slightly when he leaned in suddenly and softly kissed my cheek.

"See you in the morning," he smiled before turning around and walking towards his own cell. I reached up, pressing my fingers over where his kiss still lingered on my skin. My cheeks had turned a bright crimson as I walked over to my room, settling down on my mattress. The sleepiness that would have earlier over taken me, was now gone as my heart thudded loudly in my chest. As I stared up at the bunk bed above me, I couldn't keep from replaying that simple moment over and over again. What on earth was Rick Grimes doing to me?

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><p>Thanks again for all the support, don't forget to FavFollow and Review! Cheers.


	13. Pain In The Ass

A little soon for an update, but I finished this chapter early and I'm super excited for things to pick up from here on. I've got it planned so it should be less than 10 chapters until the start if season 4, watching season 5 right now has been giving me all sorts of ideas for the future of this story. Hope you guys enjoy this chapter, I was going to merge this one with the next one, but it would be a bit too long and I don't want to rush through the next one. So anyways, as I said before, enjoy!

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><p>Weeks crept by, with each day came cooler weather and another inch or two of snow. It was proving to be a difficult winter, but nothing we couldn't handle. I was settling in a lot easier, which was good considering Grace and I had been with the group for four months now. We usually stuck close to Carol, her motherly nature was a comfort I eagerly sought out in times when I needed advice without feeling like I was being scrutinized. Surprisingly I even found myself forming a bond with the hunter, even more so as we often spent our early mornings in the bush seeking out some kind of meal for the others back at the prison. Over a few days he had taught me a few tricks, though I still hadn't managed to get my hands on that crossbow. He would catch me looking at it, grumbling his warning about me keeping my hands to myself if I still wanted all my fingers attached. I shrugged his threats off as playful banter and we continued our hunt; rarely did we ever bring anything back larger than a few squirrels or the odd rabbit. It seemed enough though, Carol and a woman named Rosie prepared the meals and somehow managed to find a way to make it last among the whole group. The only upside to the snow was that it slowed down the walkers, giving us some relief on the fences. Grace didn't mind the weather though, often playing with the other kids as they started snowball fights and built large forts and snowmen. For once it felt like the world beyond the fences didn't exist, especially when I watched as she ran around, ducking to avoid the few snowballs hurling in her direction. I would feel my small smile forming when I heard her laugh echo around the field; somehow I managed to pull it out of all the other noise that filled the air; as though it were the only sound I heard. The winter slowly slipped away, bringing us closer to spring and further from the unpleasant cool weather.<p>

The snow was still sticking to the ground as I made my out to the field on an early crisp morning, it had been over a week since the last snowfall and the others suspected we were now making our way into a new season. With the new season brought new changes, one of which I was included on. I raised my hand, hovering just above my eyes as I searched out into the bright field for Rick. It was hard to tell time, but I assumed I was meeting him at a reasonable hour as I pulled the fence to the side and made my way to the center. Thankfully the boots I always wore were waterproof, and over the course of the winter they came in quite handy when Daryl and I went out to hunt in the frosted forest off in the distance. I stomped my way through the snow, frowning down at my feet as I tried to guess where the decline started so I didn't trip over my own feet. How I thought I would avoid this, I do not know. I was a disaster magnet, and as one would have guessed, the snow concealed the sharp decline in front of me and I slid down the small hill, flailing wildly before I reached the bottom and strong arms wrapped around me to secure my balance.

"Oh god," I muttered, "I'm sorry."

"Easy now," Rick grunted as I slammed into him, his hands sending a shock through me when his fingers touched my skin just between the hem of my shirt and the low rise jeans I put on that morning.

"Thanks," I sighed, pulling away and adjusting myself with an embarrassed grin.

"Anytime," he chuckled, "thanks for meeting me down here, I know it's early and usually you're heading off with Daryl by now…"

"Really it's no problem, Rick," I shook my head, cutting him off, "I'm happy you asked for my help."

"Couldn't think of anyone better suited for the job," he smiled, one of his hands resting on his hip as he turned to examine the empty space in front of us, "How have you been? I feel like I've barely seen you around the past few weeks."

"I have been good, learning a lot from Daryl and spending some time with Maggie and Carol. Hershel asked Daryl and I to teach the kids some stuff about hunting, just fun stuff like different sets of tracks and how to set snares; Daryl was less enthusiastic about it so I did the teaching and he did the usual brooding in the corner. Sasha has been getting me to help out with the fence with Karen and everything too, so…" I drifted off, looking over to see his amused smile, "what?"

"When I first met you, you and Grace were so stubborn, at first I wasn't sure you were going to settle in here. Now here you are listing off names and talking about everyone as if you've known them since the beginning," he smiled, "It confirms just how much you and her belong here. You're one of us."

"Just give me a minute, I'm sure I'll do something to mess it up," I mumbled, looking away in an attempt to hide the small smile that appeared from his kind words.

"I don't think there's anything you could do to mess it up, I wouldn't let them do anything to you. Besides they care about you a lot more than you care to realize," Rick looked away, his smile still visible on the corner of his lips as he surveyed the area in what I assumed to be an attempt to make this conversation less intimate than it had sounded.

"How about you, how have you been?" I asked casually, walking around him to glance at the fences, visibly assessing the strength of the metal as the walkers hungrily leaned against it.

"I'm good, getting there I suppose," he mumbled, looking over to the fences and watching the fence with the same distracted curiosity I had.

I knew he had been referring to Lori; the loss of her still affected him, more so on some days than others. His mood swings were getting less frequent, or so I was told. Every time I had been with him he had seemed perfectly stable, give or take a few times I would spot him off in the field, pacing around as his lips moved hurriedly. No doubt talking to himself or his deceased wife. I didn't judge him though, I had felt loss too, and I knew what it did to a person. I knew the way it constantly tested your sanity. I often repeated this to myself when I watched Rick, reminding myself of the grief he still carried and that all I could do was be there when he needed me to be.

"You look better," I smiled, looking over to meet his gaze as our eyes met, "happier."

"I have a lot to be happy about," Rick said softly.

"Yeah," I tore my gaze from his, desperately trying to shift the topic from anything that would send my stomach into flips, "Judith…she's growing so fast." I looked back at him in time to see his frown before it disappeared, instantly replaced with a small smile as he thought about his daughter.

"That she is," he chuckled, "she looks more and more like her mother everyday."

"She's beautiful," I nodded, doing my best to avoid talking about Lori, "I see a lot of you in her though."

"Really?" he asked, eyes lighting up. I forced a nod as the memory of a conversation with Carol came swooping into my thoughts. Shane; that had been the name of the other man, the same man who claimed that Judith was his child when Lori had first gotten pregnant. I knew Rick didn't know that I knew about Shane, about the man's sick claim on Lori's unborn child. I knew about the twisted way he tried to keep her for himself when he attempted to take Rick's life. Had I been there, I'd like to think I would have been the one to shoot him down, but the dark thought quickly vanished as I shook it from my head.

"The spitting image of you, only more feminine of course," I teased with a wink. Rick laughed softly, sending shivers through me as I heard the hoarse yet happy sound. I looked away, glancing once again at the fence a few feet away.

"So, what's all this about then?" I asked, nervously eyeing the few walkers in the distance. Why were they all in one spot?

"Well," he turned his back on the fence, facing a small plot of flat land in front of us, "I figure the snow will be gone soon, the ground will defrost and with all these new mouths to feed, why not start making out own food?"

"So…you want to build a farm?" I asked, eyeing the small space in front of us. Maybe it was the fact that I was still trying to wake up, but the image in my head was far more luxurious and grand than what the small bit of land in front of us could provide.

"Just something small, I was thinking maybe we could find some pigs, start some crops, Michonne is heading out as soon as the snow melts, maybe when she comes back we can have a stall for that horse she found last time," he continued to explain his ideas, his arms waving around as he pointed out different things and what could go where and whatnot. I _was_ excited, but hearing him talk about all the things he had planned made me feel like maybe he had overestimated the help I was capable of offering.

"I'm no farmer, or carpenter, or anything useful to this…but this whole plan sounds like a lot of work for two people, and I'm guessing you want this done within the next few weeks," I glanced around, biting my lip as I waited for him to respond. When the silence finally became too much for me, I looked up at him to see him watching me curiously as though I hadn't understood his plan.

"Everyone can help set it up, Carl even offered to help with the pigs and I thought I could use the time planting the crops to you know…spend time with him and…" Rick shook his head quickly as his words drifted, "I don't know why I keep doing that."

"Keep doing what?" I asked, looking over at him confused. He lifted his head, his soft blue eyes meeting mine once again as he held my gaze for another moment of silence.

"Keep telling you everything, it's like I have no filter when I talk to you," his tone sounded questioning, as if he were asking me to explain the problem he had found himself having difficulty trying to solve.

"Is that a bad thing?" I asked, my heart hammering loudly in my chest.

"I don't know," he admitted softly, "you're the only person here who I feel like I can talk to without feeling like you see me as something fragile, like I'm about to break any second."

"I don't know what…" I let out a heavy breath as I tried to figure out what to say, "I don't want you to feel like you have to be careful with me."

"I don't," he stated quickly, "I don't feel like I have to watch what I say or what I do, that's the thing."

"Well good," my small talk was slowly starting to die out, I wasn't sure if I could keep this conversation going without jumping in joy.

"Is it?" he asked, his expression very serious, "don't I scare you? I scare them." He nodded to the prison ahead of him.

"No, you don't scare me, Rick," I spoke softly; taking a few steps closer to him so I could reach and take his hand in mine. The unfortunate thing with Rick that I have come to realize is that it was very rare he would make the first move, "I care about you, a lot, and the last thing I want is for you to feel like you can't talk to me because you think you'll scare me off. I'm not going anywhere."

"Well good," he whispered, repeating what I had said earlier, spreading my fingers with his as he interlocked our hands. My eyebrows furrowed when I felt him lift our hands, lifting them so mine turned to his lips. A small gasp escaped my mouth as I felt his rough lips lightly graze my hand, keeping my eyes on him as I recalled the time before when I had done the same thing to him. I had done it out of comfort, very little passion was behind my actions when I had made the same gesture to him, but it was obvious that this time was different. I could see the hunger in his eyes, feel it rising in my own body as he held my hand against his mouth, lowering it slightly as he leaned in slowly. My eyes closed when I felt his breath on my mouth, parting my lips as I tried to prepare myself for what was about to happen. There was a moment of electricity zipping along every inch of my skin when I felt his lips briefly brush against mine, but the moment was quickly lost as a voice sliced through the small space between us, causing us to jump away from each other.

"Dad!" Carl shouted again, he was just pulling the gate behind him as he ran towards us. I wasn't sure if he had seen the almost kiss between his father and I, but as the boy neared and I caught the heated glare he sent in my direction I knew he had.

"Carl, you're late," Rick chuckled awkwardly as he teasingly pulled down the tip of Carl's hat so it dipped over his eyes.

"Hey!" Carl moaned, reaching to re adjust his hat before glaring at the both of us, "Sorry, I was having breakfast with Grace…lost track of time."

"Well…" I shifted uncomfortably and I looked between the two of them, "I'll leave you to explain your idea to Carl. I'm going to try and grab some breakfast and see if Daryl wants to try hunting again."

"Okay," Rick frowned, nodding slowly, "I'll get the plans going, pitch it to the council again and let you know when we start."

"_She's _helping us?" Carl groaned, rolling his eyes when Rick shot him a look.

"I don't have to," I quickly interjected, feeling the shame swell through me as I realized I was intimated by a thirteen-year-old boy, "I mean if you just want to keep it so it's just a father son thing…I don't mind."

I waited, expecting Rick to relent to Carl's complaining as he usually did. Carl looked over to Rick, eyebrows perked as he waited for Rick to agree to my suggestion.

"No," Rick said gruffly, looking over to Carl with his arms crossed. The authority in his tone sounded almost foreign to me, "Carl I asked her to help, if you have a problem with that then you don't need to help us. It's time you start being more respectful to the others, especially Emma."

"Seriously?" Carl complained, looking over at me with narrowed cold eyes, "Can she even help us anyway?"

"It's not up for discussion," Rick warned.

"Fine," Carl snapped, "Just as long as she doesn't get in my way."

"Carl," Rick growled, they looked at each other, an unspoken argument fuming between the two.

"Sorry, Emma," Carl said bitterly, not taking his eyes off his father, "can't wait to work together."

"Sure," I back away, stumbling slightly when my heel caught onto a rock. When I heard Carl's obnoxious snort I couldn't keep the heat from rising to my cheeks.

"Are you even going to make it back?" Carl teased, "She can barely keep on her own feet, never mind help us with this."

"Emma, you okay?" Rick asked, ignoring his sons comment as he took a step closer to me.

"I'll be fine, no problem," I smiled forcefully, "see you both later."

Without waiting around to give Carl more ammo to use against me, I quickly turned on my heel, hurrying up the hill and towards the fence as I replayed the few minutes before Carl arrived in my head. I swear that boy had the worst possible timing in the world, but as I thought back to the moment, recalling the feeling of Rick's lips only barely a millimeter from my own, I couldn't shake the relief that swept through me. As eager as I was to take that step with Rick, I wasn't sure either of us was ready for it. I shrugged the feeling off as I entered the common area, finding a seat next to Maggie and pretending to listen to the lively conversation going around the table as I ate my oatmeal. The only thing I could think of though was of Carl, and how this kid was really starting to get on my nerves.

* * *

><p>Daryl and I walked side by side, our game proudly strapped on a rope dangling from around our necks as we walked past the wooden spikes sticking out from the ground surrounding the fence.<p>

"You got an arm, girl," he chuckled, eyeing the few rabbit I had managed to catch earlier from our hunt.

"I've had some good teachers," I teased, nudging my elbow playfully into his side as he grunted.

"Whatever," he mumbled. I only rolled my eyes; Daryl was never one to accept a compliment.

"Looks like we'll be having some good stew the next few days," Tyreese eyed the animals hanging at our sides as he let us past the gate.

"Whatever, just so long as Rosie is makin' it. That woman knows how to cook some squirrel," Daryl called back as we hurried up the hill. Tyreese followed us into the prison, finding a seat next to Sasha after he sent out another guy on watch.

"Ooh, whatcha got there?" Carol asked reaching for the rope Daryl and I pulled over our heads.

"Just a couple of squirrel, a few rabbit," Daryl muttered, sitting down on the table closest and leaning back against the table as he relaxed.

"Thank you," Carol smiled, turning to hand the dead animals to someone behind her.

"Yeah, yeah," he grumbled, I lowered myself next to him as I stretched out my legs.

"Looks like they're starting to come out again, must mean winter is almost over," I said, eyeing the squirrels as Carol starting preparing them. Daryl taught her how to do all that a while back apparently, though the woman was still a little sloppy at it, I admired her handiwork. Daryl seemed to notice the same thing as he grimaced, watching the hack job with an unimpressed expression.

"Soon we'll be getting some bigger game," Daryl nodded, smirking when I winced from the loud crack as Carol roughly slammed the knife down to decapitate the furry animal.

"I think we'll have to do the gutting and all when the time comes," I mumbled, only loud enough so he could hear as we watch Carol slide the few mangled pieces into the large pot beside her.

"Agreed," he nodded. I lifted myself off the seat, not caring to watch the rest of Carol's handy work as I walked to my room. A familiar giggle had me slow my pace, stopping just a few feet outside the cell before I peeked my head around the corner. At first I couldn't move, the rage bubbling inside me as I watched Carl lean in and kiss Grace roughly, she looked surprised, but leaned into the kiss as he wrapped his hand around her neck. She moaned into his mouth, and suddenly the anger spilled over and I hurried over, pulling Carl off Grace.

"Hey!" he yelled, shoving my hand from his jacket when I stepped in between the two of them.

"Em, what are you doing?" Grace groaned I didn't have to be facing her to know her face was entirely pink.

"Carl, I think it's time you left," I snapped, surprised at the ferocity in my voice as I spoke down to the boy.

"You can't tell me what to do," Carl shook his head slightly, a cocky smile on his lips as he eyed me.

"Get out," I hissed, the rage inside me causing my hand to shake when I pointed outside of our cell, the direction I was ready to kick his little ass towards.

"Or what? You'll tell my dad? Make a big scene and get him to give me a stern talking to?" Carl chuckled darkly, "go ahead, maybe then he'll actually talk to me for more than five minutes."

"Carl…" Grace spoke up behind me, but I looked down at her with a warning glare, watching as she shrank back into the corner of the room before I turned back to Carl.

"I don't think now is the best time for you and I to be having this conversation," I said sternly, the anger slowly dying down as his words sunk in.

"Whatever," he scoffed, glaring at us before stalking out of the room.

"Emma…" Grace choked, I turned to look at her, frowning when I saw the tears streaming down her cheeks.

"Hey…" I pulled her in, feeling her gentle sobs as she cried into my stomach, "I'm sorry I snapped, he and I…he's just been a pain in my ass every since we got here."

"I know," she mumbled, pulling away and wiping her eyes, "he really doesn't like you, at all."

"Wow, wonderful. Tell me something I don't know," I sighed, falling onto my bed and leaning back against the wall.

"I like him, Emma," Grace muttered, sitting next to me slowly. I raised my arm, and after a moment of hesitation she snuggled closer, draping her arm across my stomach and resting her head on my chest.

"I know," I sighed again, soothingly stroking her hair as I felt a few more tears drop onto my shirt.

"He scares me," she admitted softly, my hand froze on her shoulder, "sometimes he's kind…and he listens to what I'll say and I'll listen to what he says, but then other times it's like I don't know who he is. Like he's a stranger or something."

"He hasn't…" I struggled to find the words as I pictured Carl laying a finger on Grace, "he hasn't hurt you or anything, has he?"

"No," she shook her head quickly, "but I'm scared he might hurt himself."

"He won't, he's strong," I mumbled, my thoughts drifting wildly as I tried to bring some understanding to what had become of this day.

"Emma…" she pulled away, staring into my eyes with a very serious look, "I'm worried. He doesn't have anyone; I can't help him, not with this. But maybe you can."

"What do you want me to do, Grace?" I asked annoyed, "braid his hair and discuss his problems over scrabble? He's not you and I, Grace. He won't open up to me."

"Maybe if you opened up first, maybe he might talk to you," she suggested, ignoring the dramatic roll of my eyes.

"Like I'm going to give that kid any more reason to make fun of me," I shook my head.

"Please, Emma. Just try," Grace begged, her small lips tightening in a deep frown. At first I was hard set on 'no', prepared to argue for the rest of the night if that's what it took to finally get the message across. But the pleading look in her eyes had me second-guessing my decision.

"Fine," I groaned, "Fine, I'll talk to him."

"Oh thank you!" she lunged forward, roughly squeezing against me as she wrapped her arms around my neck.

"Whatever," I grumbled, patting her back as I tried to convince myself that I was doing the right thing. What the hell had I gotten myself into?

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><p>So I hope after the next chapter you guys understand why I didn't link the two, I just want it separate from everything that happened in this one and didn't want it to seem to scattered. Thanks again for all the support, don't forget to add this story to your alerts and review! Cheers.<p> 


	14. Revelations

I've been planning out this chapter for a while, so I hope you guys like it. This is one of my favourite chapters so far because we get a little background on Emma and some one-on-one with her and Carl.

_**Note:**_ There is a small part where Emma sings, and for an idea of what I imagined it sounded like I found a cover online that was close ( watch?v=vjhYByD-2CI) so if anyone wants to listen to it for the small scene, I definitely recommend it.

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><p>I'm not going to lie. I was putting off the confrontation with Carl for as long as I could, hell I would sooner tell Rick how I felt about him than try and have a heart to heart with his son. This stuck with me for a few days, and somehow I managed to come up with reasonable excuses as to why I was putting it off when Grace would ask me every night when I would return to our room. Eventually going hunting with Daryl and volunteering for watch and fence duty wasn't going to be enough for her, I could see the disappointment in her eyes each time I had to tell her that I hadn't gotten to speak with the young boy yet. With each day Grace was growing more impatient, and I more anxious. I knew she wasn't about to let me off the hook, I knew she would keep asking, and eventually her pestering would become more constant until I finally cracked. I just wasn't sure I could take seeing that sad look in her eyes each time I had to tell her that I was too busy. Every night I had spent hours laying in bed thinking about it until I finally drifted off, and tonight was no different. I weighed the pros and cons of confronting Carl yet again, coming up with different ideas for conversation before tossing them from my thoughts when I realized just how stupid it sounded. I knew it had to be soon, that the talk with Carl would have to happen sooner rather than later, both for my sanity and to ease Grace's worry. Unfortunately I didn't realize how soon until I heard the familiar soft cries fill up the quiet cell block, Judith's hungry wails vibrating off the concrete walls. I was only a few rooms away, and without a second thought I lifted myself off the bed and tiptoed out of the cell, picking up my pace when Judith's cries grew louder. I spotted Beth emerging from her own cell, and I did my best to suppress the smirk fighting its way onto my lips when I saw her jump into action. It looked almost robotic for her.<p>

"Hey," I whispered as I quickly came up next to her, smiling softly as she rubbed her eyes tiredly, "it's okay, I'm already awake, I can take care of it."

"You sure?" she said groggily, glancing back over to the source of the crying, "Rick's on watch right now, I can stick around until he gets back. She's probably just hungry."

"Don't worry about it, I'm more awake than you are, just go back to bed," I pushed her lightly back into her cell, and after a long sigh and a shy smile she finally gave in, waving goodnight as she dragged her feet back over to her bunk. My smile widened when I caught sight of Hershel snoring softly from the bottom bunk, mentally noting to myself that I should talk to the old man more.

Judith's cries continued, and I hurried into the room without thinking, pulling her from her crib and holding her against me. A soft snore to my right caught my attention, and I looked over to see Carl in a deep sleep as his arm hung off the top bunk, drool slowly oozing from his parted lips as he snored loudly once more. I laughed softly, shaking my head as I walked out of the room with the now quiet Judith in my arms, if only Grace had seen the charming Carl Grimes at his finest.

It didn't take long to get a bottle prepared, and Judith was surprisingly patient as it warmed up. I did my best to distract her as we waited, making funny faces and talking to her in a high-pitched voice. I smiled down at her as I bounced her lightly in my arms, bringing the warm bottle against my skin to check that it wasn't too hot before placing the nipple on the top and dipping it down into her mouth. As if it were somehow possible for my smile to grow any wider, the sound of her eager slurps had my grin stretch further enough that my cheeks started to ache. Again I stared down at the little human, completely amazed at her beauty and utter innocence as she gazed up at me curiously. My grin faltered when the formula was quickly sucked through the nipple only minutes later, leaving only a few more mouth full's. Normally this wouldn't be an issue, but it was late, and Judith was still staring up at me wide-eyed and completely awake. I frowned down at her as she swallowed the remaining drops, a goofy smile instantly taking over her face when I pulled the bottle away.

"Any chance you're just going to pass out in a few seconds?" I muttered, her loud shriek was enough answer as I looked around the empty common area for help. Not wanting to make too much noise and disturb the others, I walked over towards the far corner of the room, sitting with my back leaning against the table and away from the entrance.

"Maybe you'd like a little song?" I suggested, rubbing her cheek softly as she cooed. I smiled nervously, though it wasn't a big audience, I still didn't like singing. Ever since I arrived at the prison, I assumed singing was Beth's thing, and was grateful for the sense of humanity it blanketed the group in when she shared one of her songs. But as I stared down at the child in my arms, I could only bring myself to hum to Frank Sinatra's "The Way You Look Tonight". I was used to singing ridiculous campfire songs, I didn't have to worry about how I sounded as I was often drowned out by the eager young voices, but now as I sat in this empty room, it was just Judith and I. I cleared my throat, singing low enough that I was sure no one else would hear. My voice was slightly raspy, but in tune with the song as I sang to her.

"Some day, when I'm awfully low

When the world is cold

I will feel a glow just thinking of you

And the way you look tonight."

I smiled when I saw her eyes begin to droop; proud of the way the song affected her as she began to drift off.

"Yes, you're lovely, with your smile so warm

And your cheeks so soft

There is nothing for me but to love you

And the way you look tonight"

When I heard her familiar deep and steady breaths, I brought my voice lower, turning the song back into a hum as I lifted off the bench and danced with her to the rest of the song. My movements were small and didn't disturb her as she fell into a deep sleep. I turned, now facing the rest of the room as I finished humming the rest of the song, looking up so I could see where I was going to take her back to her bed when I nearly screamed when I saw that I hadn't been alone. Carl stood a few feet away, watching me curiously as I caught my breath and tried to slow my heart rate. My cheeks growing warm when I realized he had heard me singing, and quite possibly talking to the infant like an idiot.

"Hey," I whispered, biting my lip as I shifted my weight. The present situation was already starting to make me uncomfortable.

"Hey," he said gruffly, looking away as he hid a long yawn, "Just came to see where Judith was. Didn't mean to listen or anything."

"It's fine," I said slowly, lowering myself onto another seat as I looked at him, "I actually wanted to talk to you, I mean if now is an okay time; I don't' want to take you from getting some sleep."

"Sure," he shrugged tiredly, glancing down at his sleeping sister before sitting across from me. It was clear he had gotten out of bed in a hurry, his dark shaggy hair was incredibly messy and missing the cowboy hat he never went anywhere without.

"It's about Grace," I started, "and about this…tension between you and I."

"Yeah…and?" he asked, crossing his arms with an annoyed huff.

"I'm worried, for one, about you and her," I raised a hand slowly in a stop motion when I saw him begin to protest, "hear me out. I'm not trying to prevent whatever it is you have going with her, I just want to make sure you know that I care about her a lot, and if you hurt her then you'll have me to answer to. Not your dad, not Carol, or anyone else here. Me."

"There's a surprise," he grumbled.

"I'm serious Carl, this beef you have against me needs to stay between you and me. I don't need you hurting her just to get back at me," I sighed, eyeing him carefully as his eyebrows perked.

"Is that what you think?" he asked, eyes narrowing as he leaned forward slightly, "that I'm using her?"

"You haven't exactly made me feel very welcome here, and I'm starting to think you have no limits when it comes to letting me know just how much you hate me."

"I don't hate you."

"It doesn't seem like it."

"Well I don't."

"Then why all the insults, why all the teasing and the constant attitude towards me?" I asked, my voice rising as I spoke. We both turned our heads towards the entrance, waiting a moment to see if we had woken anyone with our conversation.

"I don't hate you," he repeated, his voice barely a whisper, "I hate seeing you with my dad, I hate seeing how happy you are when you're with him, I hate seeing how happy he is when he's with you."

"Carl…" I barely had the chance to go on when he interrupted.

"Ever since my mom…ever since the Governor…" he shook his head angrily, "he's barely spoken to me, barely spent time with Judith. And suddenly you show up and he's spending all this time with you and I thought the farm was just something for us. I thought maybe…"

"Carl I'm not trying to get between you and your father, I'm sorry if that's how it looks, but that's not what I'm intending," I started, but once again Carl was quick to interrupt.

"As if," he scoffed, his voice a harsh whisper, "I see the way you look at him. I see the way you act around him, I'm not blind. And now I finally find someone to talk to and you get in the way of that too."

"Carl," I began again, taking a deep breath as I attempted to cool the anger rising in me, "look I know what it's like to lose people you love, and I know what it feels like to feel like you have no one…"

"No you don't!" he shouted, standing up and moving to tower over me, his voice dropped back to a whisper before he continued, "you don't know shit about losing anyone, you only know how to take. You took my dad, and now you're taking Grace."

"What are you talking about?" I asked, glancing down to make sure Judith was still asleep in my arms before I continued, "I'm not taking anything, and _yes_ I _have_ lost people. I've lost a lot more than you know."

"Don't try to compare yourself to me," he snapped, "you didn't have to kill her, you didn't have to put a bullet through her head."

"I'm not comparing myself to you, Carl," I said softly, frowning at the mention of Lori, "I'm just telling you that I've lost, that I can relate and that I'm here to talk about it if you need to."

"I don't need you," he mumbled, sitting back down across from me, crossing his arms once again as he looked down at his feet, "I _don't_ need you."

"Can I just talk then?" I suggested, moving forward slightly so I could bend slightly and meet his gaze without smothering Judith, "Can I just tell you about me, about why I think I can help. You don't need to say anything just listen, please." He shrugged in response and I took a deep shaky breath as I prepared to tell him a bit about my past.

"You know already about my brother, about how I lost him at the start of all this. The truth is a little darker than I initially let on," I sat back looking at the floor as I spoke, but I could feel his eyes on me, "he hadn't been bit or anything, and while I would have thought he would have a strong head during the whole apocalypse nonsense, he proved to be a lot weaker than I had expected. As soon as people started dropping in our town, he admitted that he couldn't handle it, he couldn't wait around and push to survive only to just die."

"What happened?" Carl asked curiously.

"He asked me to kill him, said he couldn't bring himself to do it on his own. I tried to convince him otherwise, tried to give him incentive to live. Told him whatever I could, that we could try and get some friends together and find or build some sort of refuge, that a cure was sure to follow, that I was pregnant," I stopped, surprised that I had just told Carl the one secret I was set on carrying to my grave.

"What?" he sat forward, eager to hear more.

"I…I was only two or three months along. I had just gone for my first check up a few days earlier, heard its heartbeat and everything. It was the one thing that seemed to have him reconsider, but after a few minutes he just started crying, going on about how he couldn't let my baby be brought into the world when this epidemic was spreading. He didn't see any other choice, said he was doing me a favor before he tackled me. Fell onto my stomach and killed my child before I had a second to put two and two together, I was just starting to figure out what he meant before I had the air knocked out of me," I was surprised at the calm of my voice, thankful that Carl remained silent as I explained, "he had gone crazy, the world turning to shit did a number on him and I know now that he genuinely thought he was doing me a favor. But I didn't hesitate a second longer as he lifted himself off me, begging me to forgive him before I pulled out his gun from his holster and shot him."

A long silence followed, Carl sat shocked as he tried to make sense of what I had just told him. Eventually the silence was too much for me and I continued.

"I found a doctor a few days later, who confirmed that I had lost the baby and helped me with the rest of it, a week later and my whole town had been consumed by death and rotted corpses. I never got the chance to grieve; I never gave myself one. In my mind I had lost my brother long before I killed him, and my baby was dead the moment I heard it's heartbeat on the monitor. If I had carried to term, I would have been alone and most likely would have died and the baby along with me. I'm not saying I'm grateful for what he did, but it's not something I hold against him either," I did my best to shrug it off, fighting hard to hold back the tears as my eyes burned from the memory.

"I'm sorry that happened to you," Carl whispered finally.

"Me too," I frowned down at Judith, again rubbing my finger against her cheek.

"Did you ever find out what it was going to be?" Carl asked. I looked up meeting his soft gaze with a small smile.

"I never got the chance, but I had the feeling it was a girl," I looked back down at Judith as a soft snore escaped her parted lips.

"She likes you, you know," Carl leaned forward, brushing some of Judith's hair to the side as he spoke.

"She's a special little one," I nodded, "your mom would have been proud to see how much you take care of her."

"I like to think so," Carl whispered thoughtfully.

"I may not have known her, but I hear about her often, and I know how much she loved you. If anyone had to do it, it was you," I reached for his hand, holding it tightly in my grasp, "I know how hard it is to make that kind of call, but you did the right thing. Don't doubt yourself."

"Sometimes I wonder what it would be like if she was still alive," Carl murmured, looking down at our hands curiously, "maybe then my dad wouldn't be crazy. Maybe we would have gotten rid of the Governor a lot sooner."

"That's not something you can think about now, Carl," I squeezed his hand gently, "You can't keep thinking about the 'what ifs' you just need to be there for him, and for her." I nodded down at Judith as she stirred in my arms.

"It's hard," he admitted, "I feel like I'm all alone sometimes, like there's this voice in my head nagging at me, reminding me just how isolated I feel sometimes, it drives me crazy."

"You're not alone, Carl, I know it may seem like he's not always there, but Rick's still your father. He loves you more than you realize. And I know you and I have had our issues, but I'm here for you too," I smiled weakly, squeezing his hand once more reassuringly, "I'm a good listener, even if all you need to do it yell or just talk without me saying anything, just so you have someone to talk to."

"Thanks, Emma," he said softly, eyes meeting mine as he smiled, "I can't promise that I'll take you up on that right away, but I'll try."

"Good," I leaned back, releasing his hand from my grasp and re adjusting Judith's weight in my arms.

"Do you love him?" Carl asked suddenly, and though my heart dropped at his question, my expression remained blank as I kept my gaze focused on Judith.

"I don't know," I finally whispered, looking up to see his eyes weren't hard or cold like I expected, but rather warm and understanding.

"I don't know if he loves you, but I know you make him happy," Carl nodded to himself, "and I don't know if I'll ever be okay with that, but I'll work on it."

"You don't have to, Carl," I shook my head, looking back down, "I don't want to push you to agree to something you're not okay with. Hell I don't even know what's going on between him and I half the time."

"Emma," Carl reached forward, surprising me as he pulled Judith from my hold before standing up, and looking down at me, "After my mom died, it was like he was here but he wasn't, like some part of him had died when she did. But ever since you showed up it's like he's slowly coming back to life."

"Carl…"

"You don't have to say anything, I just want you to know that your worth here goes beyond your skills with a knife and taking out a few walkers every now and then," he shrugged, backing up slowly, "this is your home now."

"Thanks," I smiled, standing up slowly as he turned around and started to leave.

"Goodnight, Emma," he called back.

"Goodnight."

"Hey, Emma?" Carl said softly, turning to look back before he disappeared into the cellblock, "I won't tell anyone about your brother…if that's what you want."

"Thanks, Carl," I nodded, waving a final goodbye before I lost sight of him in the darkness. I slumped down, collapsing on the bench roughly as I felt a huge weight lifted from me. While I still found it concerning I had just told a thirteen year old my most controversial secret it still felt like a relief to having told to the truth to someone. While I would have guessed Rick or Carol to be the first to know about my baby, and the truth about my brother, I felt awfully satisfied with how the conversation with Carl went. I knew there would still be some tension between the two of us, but something inside me had me thinking things were going to get better between him and I. Maybe not all at once, but over time and that was enough. And while the idea of Carl and Grace still sent a wave of protective instincts shuddering through me, I knew it was something I would have to learn to be more understanding of. Just as I stood up to head back to my cell, the wave of exhaustion finally settling in, the squeak of metal doors caught my attention and I watched as Rick walked into the cellblock, pausing on the bottom step when he saw me.

"You're up?" he asked softly, a small smile spreading on his mouth as he walked over to where I was standing.

"Just barely," I smiled back, gazing up into his eyes as he got closer.

"Couldn't sleep?"

"Just fed Judith, she woke up a little while ago, Carl just took her back to the room. I was just about to head back to my own bed, I practically feel it calling to me," I laughed.

"Sorry if it was any trouble, but thanks for taking care of her," he chuckled softly, "I can walk you back to your room."

"Thanks," I smiled as we walked slowly next to each other, silently wishing I wasn't so tired and that I could stay up a little longer to talk to him. But the darkness under his eyes was visible in the dim light, and I knew it wasn't much longer until he collapsed from exhaustion as well.

"Did Carl cause any trouble?" he asked as we walked into towards my cell.

"No, we actually had a nice talk," I shrugged, stopping in front of my open door and turning back to Rick.

"Really?" an eyebrow perked questioningly, and I knew he was hoping to hear more.

"Yeah, but you should probably head to bed, don't think either one of us will last much longer," I teased, elbowing his side playfully.

"Agreed," he nodded, "thanks again for helping with Judith."

"Of course," I smiled, waving goodnight before turning into my room and climbing onto my bed and under my covers. I listened carefully as he walked away, hearing his gruff voice as he woke up someone else to go on watch before the footsteps faded and the block was once again silent, save for a few loud snorers scattered throughout the cells. I didn't have any trouble falling asleep, as soon as my head it the pillow I barely had a second to think of his name before I fell into a deep and peaceful sleep.

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><p><em><strong>Disclaimer:<strong>_ I don't own Frank Sinatra's "The Way You Look Tonight"

I'm sure there might be a few readers who think that Carl wouldn't shift so easily, but I'll give you all fair warning now that the feud between them isn't over and will continue into the next few chapters. I like to think after this talk he has grown a kind of respect for her. So let me know what you think, both about Carl and Emma as well as the little bit of background on the OC. With this bit about her past revealed, I hope things will start making sense with her behaviour with Grace, Carol and Judith. Only a few more chapters until Season 4. Thanks again for all the support! Don't forget to add to your alerts and review! Cheers.


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